Concrete Angels
by willa76
Summary: Ok so this story wasn't planned, so summary is going to suck. Set in modern time. The riders meet in a group home. All with shocking back grounds, but all with the same dream of belonging in a family. Rated M.
1. Chapter 1

**I do not own the Young Riders.**

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><p>In the big city of Seattle, a small group of kids were thrusted into a state home for different but similar reasons. They had no one who was trusted enough to care for them, or they just had no one full stop.<p>

Well that is what they thought, until it was getting closer for them to go their separate ways. At the age of eighteen they were deemed old enough to care for themselves, the state no longer provided them with a bed, or food.

In the next couple of days the small group were going to be saying goodbye to the eldest. And it was then that they realised that they were closer than what they had first thought. In fact they were a family, and the thought of being separated from each other put a downer in all of their moods.

They were each other's protector, confidant, and friend. They were all each other had and they were fast realising that they were all each other needed.

Jimmy was the oldest out of the bunch, a seventeen year old boy, with a seventeen year old chip upon his shoulder.

He was mad at the world and the people who wronged him, his parents being the biggest ones from a very long list.

He was shoved into the home the night his Fathers' fists ended his Mothers' life.

Jimmy use to cower under the dining table and watch as his father would continually raise his hand and fist to his mother nearly every other night. Jimmy would cry silently and wish he was bigger than his father so he could beat the shit out of him for once, but being only a seven year old boy, there was no way that was happening.

He was so angry with his mother for not having the courage to leave. Surely she could have packed herself and him up while the monster was at work, but she never did, and she paid miserably for not doing so.

Jimmy tried to stay out of trouble, wanting to keep to himself, but for some reason trouble was attracted to him.

Kid was orphaned one wet winter's night when his parents' car collided with a tree. They were killed instantly and only a few blocks away from their home.

Kid was only six and only remembers the pitied look on the officers' face as he stared down at Kid. He was taken to his Grandparents in Missouri, but after two weeks there they decided they were too old to be looking after a child, so they sent him back to the social worker who first sent Kid to them.

Over the next ten years Kid had been in and out of so many homes that he actually rather stay in the institution. After all he knew the people there, and he always knew where he was meant to be from day to day, and the people he shared his space with. Some of the families he was placed into were not fit to have children in their home.

Buck was one of five kids in his family. They all shared the same mother but their fathers were all different. She, like Jimmy's mother, was with the wrong man, and while he did not beat her down with his hands he bought her down with drugs.

Buck wasn't as lucky as his other brothers and sisters, their fathers wanted them so they had homes to go too. His oldest brother swore that he would come for Buck, but he never came.

Cody was taken from his mother when she was arrested for murder. His mother killed an undercover cop while she was selling herself. Of course she was just a small part in a bigger investigation, but all the same it was her prints that were found on the gun, no one else's.

Cody was ten, and a lot like Jimmy he had a chip on his shoulder, but while Jimmy tried to shy away from trouble, Cody seemed to go looking for it.

He was full of mischief and seemed to be living in a fantasy world most of the time.

Ike, a year younger than Cody was shy and more reserved than the other boys, of course being a mute didn't help.

No one knew how he lost the ability to talk, but Buck heard one of the teachers say it was a permanent thing. The group all started to learn sign language so they could communicate with him.

Ike was a lost soul.

Always the main character in everyone's jokes. Dummy, stupid, retard, were words that were thrown at him on a daily basis. Many times he thought about ending his life, but just when he would think that his life wasn't worth living, Buck, or one of his other friends would swoop in and pick him up.

He wondered if they had super powers that knew what he was thinking. But they didn't they just knew when their friend Ike was feeling blue.

Lou, the same age as Ike, 15 going on 16, thought how sad it was that she couldn't hear his voice. She longed to hear him laugh as his smile was one of the most beautiful one's she had ever seen.

Lou's mother, brother and sister were all killed in a horrific murder, to which she is the only one who knows who did it and how it happened.

Lou hid when she heard raised voices coming from the front door. She hid herself well so the attackers could not see her, but she could see them as clear as day.

If she had been found, she had no doubt that she would be six feet under. The police interrogated her for days but she would not give them anything. She felt that if they did their job properly then they would find the killer on their own. Of course six years later and she knew they still were no closer to arresting the man that did it.

Lou was placed into more homes than any of the boys. It seemed that foster homes more often than not wanted girls. This pissed the boys off to no end. They watched as Lou came and went, they saw the way it fucked with her mind and confidence every time. She was starting to lose herself and was slipping into a dark depression.

Kid and Jimmy both worried about what will happen to her and Ike when they were gone. They have looked into even fostering them themselves when they leave, but they would need financial stability and a home.

Jimmy turns eighteen in a weeks' time, Kid three days after him. They both had big ideas of finding a well paid job and a place close by so they could visit the others often.

Buck would turn eighteen a month after Kid and Cody four months after him. Then they would all have to wait for Ike and Lou, who were still just over two years away from that day.

Jimmy knew that anything could happen in that time, but he tried to stay positive that they would all end up back together.

Jimmy awoke to the sound of what some may say a riot, but it was just the sound of everyday life in this shit hole.

"Hey happy Birthday," Buck sung as he kicked Jimmy's cot. "Finally getting out of this place how does that feel?"

"Bittersweet." Jimmy told him truthfully. "Good to leave here, sad to be leaving a few of you behind."

"Won't be long till we are all free. We have lasted this long another year or two won't kill us." Buck joked, but he knew, like Jimmy did that, that wasn't completely true.

"Happy birthday," Kid rushed out as he ran into the room.

"Thanks, but what's the rush," Jimmy laughed looking at Buck who was also amused by Kid's eagerness.

"Lou is being fostered out, you might want to get up and say goodbye before she goes."

"God damn it," Jimmy hissed as he threw himself out of his cot. "She only got back three days ago, and she's still not talking about that place." Surely the councillors could see that it was tearing her apart.

Buck and Kid had seen a sad change in her as well. But there was nothing they could do. Buck actually wondered if it would be best if she and Ike just ran away from the home instead of waiting another two years.

Jimmy quickly pulled some clothes on and ran out to where the office was situated. A snooty looking woman was standing there looking down at Lou in disgust, while Lou looked down at the ground. He could see that the ladies lips were moving so he knew she was talking to Lou but he could not hear what was being said.

Lou showed no signs of listening to what she was being told, so Jimmy had a good idea that it was nothing good.

"Jesus Jimmy, can't you take her with you now?" Cody hissed, joining the rest of the boys.

Jimmy went to go and say goodbye, but watched as Ike rounded the corner to say goodbye first.

Lou threw her arms around his neck, talking quickly in his ear. Ike nodded and slipped something in her back pocket of her jeans.

"Stop hogging her," Jimmy joked with Ike who smiled over Lou's shoulder. Ike pulled away allowing Jimmy his turn to hug her. Lou's arms would not be able to reach Jimmy's neck so she wrapped them tight around his waist.

"Happy Birthday," she whispered softly.

"Thanks honey," he squeezed her tightly before telling her to stay safe and to just get through this year. She agreed before uttering and hugging her goodbyes with the rest of the boys.

By lunch time Jimmy was all signed off as an adult and he was packed up and ready to go. Sadly he said goodbye to the rest of the boys, with a promise to Kid that he would be waiting for him outside in three days time.

In those three days Jimmy stayed under a bridge, not being able to afford much more. He looked through papers for jobs and knocked on a few doors. The sudden realisation hitting him that it maybe not be as easy as he thought.

Just as planned Jimmy was waiting outside for Kid three days later. Ike, Buck and Cody were all there to say goodbye.

Buck knew it wasn't long before he too would be free. Cody on the other hand didn't think he would be able to see his couple of months out. He was getting itchy feet, and was tried with people in this place.

Unlike Jimmy, Kid was able to find work on his second day looking. It wasn't much, clearing tables at a local restaurant, but it was money and food.

Buck was getting out later today, so the boys were passing time by looking at the local stores.

"You know Jimmy, maybe you will have better luck finding a job if you cut your hair." Kid said with a smile. Jimmy's dark hair was now well past his shoulders, and most of the time looked messy.

"Funny." Jimmy stated.

An older man was listening to the friendly banter between the two boys.

"It shouldn't matter what my hair looks like, I'm a hard worker."

"I know that, and you know that, you just have to find a way to show someone else it." Kid acknowledged as he picked up a magazine with a horse on the front of it.

He had always dreamed of living on a ranch, in the middle of nowhere, answering to no one but himself and the land.

"I could see us all on a big ranch somewhere." Kid said aloud to Jimmy. Once again grabbing the older man's attention.

"Kid the only way that could happen is if we won the lottery." Jimmy told him.

"I can dream, can't I?" Kid snapped defensively.

"Course you can they're free." Jimmy said feeling bad that he may have hurt Kid's feelings, "We better go. We got Buck to get, jobs to find,"

"You will get a job." Kid reassured his friend.

As the two boys went to leave the store, the older man couldn't keep his mouth shut. From what he had heard and seen he knew that these two boys were just what his brothers' property needed.

"Ah excuse me boys, I don't mean to listen in on your conversation," The older man started, trying to gage what mood the boys were in. "You're looking for work?"

"Well geeze mister if you have work for me, you can butt in any time you like," Jimmy laughed.

"Yes, well it isn't me exactly, you see my brother, Teaspoon Hunter, and he's looking for station hands." Kid's eyes widened at this. "He lives in Wyoming, near the Laramie Mountains."

Kid was excited, but Jimmy was weary. "This all just seems to convenient mister."

"Jimmy would you shut your mouth before you ruin this opportunity for the both of us." Kid hissed under his breath.

"No Kid I won't just shut my mouth. This man over hears us talking and he just so happens to have your dream at the ready, I have a right to ask questions."

"You do son, but maybe they are best asked to Teaspoon himself. I will give you his details, it is up to you to contact him, I have done my part."

He pulled his wallet out of the back pocket of his jeans. He asked the shop keeper if he would mind lending him a pen and a piece of paper.

After copying Teaspoon's phone number and address on the paper he handed it to the boys. "Good luck," was all he said before walking away.

"Jimmy I can't believe you."

"I can't believe you, falling for that bullshit." Jimmy said still as sceptical as before.

Two months later and Buck, Jimmy and Kid were all living and working on Teaspoon's ranch. The place was beautiful, the air was clean and Teaspoon and Rachel were two of the nicest people the boys had ever met.

Jimmy's eagerness for hard work was soon put to the test, and has been everyday they are there. But he loved it, more than what he thought he would, though riding a horse was something that did not come natural for him.

Kid on the other hand must have been a cowboy in a past life. He took to it so naturally, and Jimmy loved that his friend was finally happy.

Buck, like Kid was also a natural, but he was missing Ike, Lou and Cody too much to really enjoy it. Cody was pissed off that the boys had a place to go and would be a long way away to visit. Ike and Lou on the other hand didn't say much, I mean what could they say.

They had no right in holding the others back, making them stay around here for another year. So they both told them how happy they were for them, even though the thought of them being so far away hurt.

One day the boys came up with an idea, and with a united front they all approached Teaspoon.

"Excuse me Mr Spoon," Kid begun, pulling Teaspoon away from the old green tractor that was continuously breaking down.

"Now son how many times do I have to tell you Teaspoon is all you have to call me, Rachel is only making fun when she calls me that."

"Sorry Teaspoon," Kid apologised. "Could we ask you something?"

"Sure," Teaspoon said, getting a feeling that this was going to need his upmost attention, so he put down his tools and sat down on the tire of the tractor.

"We were wondering if you could use some more help. There are still plenty of jobs that need doing, even after ours are done, and we know the right people that could help you." Teaspoon tried to rein in his smile.

"Oh you do, do you?" to which the boys nodded. "How many are we talking?"

"Three," Buck piped up. "Cody, Ike and Lou,"

"Three more boys," Teaspoon thought out loud, to which the boys all looked at each other wondering if they should correct him about Lou. "I don't think I can take three more on, one maybe, but not three."

"What if you kept one of our wages back, as if board for the other two?" Jimmy suggested.

"I'll think about it. In the mean time how bout you make a start on the fences in the west paddock."

The boys ran off hoping that Teaspoon would agree.

While the boys were out mending fences, Teaspoon got on the phone and made some inquires. Rachel had asked him to please bring the other boys here. She always wanted a big family but could never fall pregnant. She hated the thought that her boys were missing their friends.

Teaspoon got off of the phone with some good and bad news. He didn't know how Buck, Jimmy and Kid were going to take it, but hoped that they would be ok.

"So who was going to let me know that Lou is actually a girl?" Teaspoon asked as the boys sat down for their dinner.

Jimmy, Kid and Buck stared at one another, taken back at how Teaspoon knew that.

"I called that home you boys came from and inquired about your three friends. It seems to be that Cody ran away two weeks ago with a couple of other boys, and Lou or Louise it may seem, has been placed into a foster home as of last week. Ike is the only one there."

"Bloody Cody," Jimmy snapped.

"Ike will be joining us in a few days, I'm sorry about your other friends there was nothing I could do."

"Thanks Teaspoon, we appreciate it." Kid said with a long face. He was happy that Ike was coming here, but would have loved having Cody and Lou with them as well.

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><p><strong>Would love to know what you think. I started copying The Price of War but this one seemed to write itself. <strong>


	2. Chapter 2

**I do not own the Young Riders**

"Cody, come on man, we're late."

"Who gives a shit?" Cody snarked back.

"Ah, Wicks." Cody's friend Tommy replied.

Cody knew that that was true, but he would not let his friend believe that their boss scared him. He grabbed the money he owed Wicks' before quickly checking his appearance in the bathroom mirror.

Wicks' always threw the biggest parties but hadn't in months, so Cody knew that this was going to be a huge night, with plenty of ladies there.

He walked into the house with a swagger that owned the room. His confidence in himself shone through his every movement.

The people around him would not hesitate in ending his miserable life. They were business men, who's business was everything but legit.

They didn't need a cocky little son of a bitch, who thought he was all that and a little bit more, but Cody, while cocky and arrogant, oozed self respect.

He was respected amongst the older men, he had the gift of the gab and had given no one any reason to doubt or mistrust him.

As the night rolled on, girls, money and drugs were all on the table and although Cody was always surrounded in heavy drugs, the young man's eyes stayed only on the girls.

He would never taste what he sold. He had seen how easy it was to be claimed and owned by the stuff. It made them all weak and vulnerable and that was not who Cody desired to be.

"I have had enough of you, you little whore." The angry voice of Wicks' yelled as the sound of a back hand hitting skin sounded out.

Cody usually not worrying about Wicks' getting heavy with one of his girls just happened to turn his head.

He watched as Wicks kept raising his hand at the small figure he held in his other hand. He was disgusted by the actions of his employer but he kept his mouth shut. Wicks is his meal ticket, Cody could not afford to lose that.

That was until the small figure was thrown to the ground, and her face was clear for everyone to see.

Cody recognised the bloodied face staring up at her attacker with horror filled eyes.

'It can't be.' He said to himself.

Rage started filling Cody as he saw that Wicks' was undoing his belt buckle with a lustful scowl on his face.

"Gather round boys and watch the show." Wicks' sung as he pulled his trousers to the floor.

Cody not needing to see anymore flew across the room tackling Wicks' to the floor.

"Lou get out of here," Cody roared as he tried getting in as many punches as he could before Wicks' men came in and took over.

Lou was shocked that she knew that voice. A voice that she thought she would never hear again.

She didn't think twice, Cody had given her freedom and she was going to do as she was told.

She staggered to her feet, feeling dizzy and sore. She could hear Cody and Wicks' going at it behind her and although she was worried about Cody she was more worried for herself at the moment.

She knew that if Wicks' got to her she would be worse off than all the other times he attacked her. She knew that one day she would die by his hands, but she was going to make sure that it wasn't today.

Lou stumbled down the driveway, blood clouding her vision, her bones aching as she moved panicking as she looked for a place to hide. There was no way she could run, she would be to slow, so she had to hide and wait for the perfect moment.

As quick as she could she hid herself in a bunch of bushes, the next driveway over. She could see Wicks' house, so she will be able to keep an eye on who was coming and going.

Now that she had stopped her worry for Cody played heavily on her mind.

The sound of heavy footsteps thundering on the cool concrete had her eyes staying glued to where she had just come from.

She carefully spread some leaves of the bush to revel Cody standing at the end of the drive way anxiously surveying his surroundings.

"Cody," Lou half whispered half yelled.

Cody's head quickly snapped to where Lou was hidden. With a quick look behind him he ran over to her.

"Lou," he held out his hand to her, "Quick we have to get out of here." Needing no more convincing she out reached her hand to his.

Over a year and a half later and they were still running, living on the streets, hiding in the shadows. Cody had long turned eighteen so no one would care if he was out here, but Lou was still a minor. If the police stopped them, she would be taken away, Lou didn't want that.

So they hid and they fought to survive every day. Some days they ate, some days they didn't. The only thing that kept them going was each other.

The year had been rough on them, especially Lou. The streets were no place for a girl, and Cody soon took on his role as her protector.

Cody awoke to the sound of a rubbish truck empting the dumpsters behind the abounded car park building, that he and Lou had called home for the last few nights.

Cody looked down at Lou's sleeping form, hoping that today was going to be a good day. He hoped that when they fell asleep tonight it would be in a bed, with food in their bellies and clean clothes on their clean bodies.

He loved her unconditionally, and for a while they tried being together but for the both of them the experience was not great, in fact being together in that way was not something they wished to ever do again.

The sound of a car back firing had Lou shoot up and off of her makeshift bed.

"It's ok Lou, it was just a car." Cody reassured her as he opened his arms out for her.

In six weeks time Lou was turning eighteen and they both thought the best plan was to be at the group home and see if any of the boys turn up to look for them.

Cody stroked her hair feeling sad that this was her life. He wished he could take her out for a meal, and that she was able to wash her hair and wear clean clothes. This was no life for her.

Over the year he had tried to talk her into going back to the home, she would have a warm bed, meals and a bathroom, but she refused.

Lou was scared that she would wind up back in Wicks' house. She told Cody that she wouldn't leave him and he wasn't allowed to leave her.

As Cody continued to stroke her hair his hand came in contact with her skin on her forehead.

"Lou are you feeling ok?" he asked her.

If Lou was sick what would he do? There was no money for medicine or a Doctor.

"I'm alright, just tired is all." Lou muttered as she slipped out of Cody's arms to lie back down on the cardboard boxes and blanket.

Worried Cody checked his watch to see it was just past seven in the morning. Lou needed fresh water and some food, but he couldn't risk leaving her here by herself.

He looked around to see if there were any familiar faces, finding Garrett and his girlfriend Nancy straight away.

They were a nice couple and Cody ever really saw them in a place like this, usually he would see them at a soup kitchen, or on the rare chance he and Lou could get a bed, the shelter.

It was a sign that the weather was indeed getting cooler and the homeless were getting desperate for some sort of warmth.

Cody kissed Lou on her head and told her to keep sleeping while he ran out to get a few things, of course she wanted to argue, and go with him, but she was just so tired she fell back asleep.

Cody kept his eyes peeled as he walked the streets. If you were quick enough, you would be amazed at what you could grab while no one was watching.

A couple of hours later and Cody was heading back to Lou with some clean tops and some sweat pants, and although they were both men's clothing, he knew Lou would just be happy that they were clean. He also got his hands on some water, but had to spend the money he did have on some bread. Bread was filling and didn't cost too much.

Once he got back to Lou, he told her to grab her soap and shampoo, that today they were going to have a shower. He hoped that she would feel better after a hot shower.

Cody had seen a men's gym on his way back, he walked in soon finding the showers and changing rooms. No one watched this area so surely Lou and he could slip in both unnoticed.

"Quick Lou inside." Cody told her pulling her into the men's bathroom at the gym.

They both needed showers before they put on the clean clothes Cody had swiped this morning.

Lou felt grimy and disgusting, as she shed her clothes. She knew she was getting sick as one minute she would be cold the next she felt far too hot. She hoped it was just a cold as she knew Cody would be stressing out about getting her to a Doc.

As Cody shed his clothes too, he gave a quick glance at Lou, not to be a pervert, but just to see how she was doing. He had noticed last time they showered that she had lost a reasonable amount of weight.

Biting his lip so he didn't hiss, it was clear that she had lost even more. Cody didn't know if this was because of the lack of food, or the amount of walking they did, maybe a bit of both.

"Here Lou," Cody held out a bar of soap, to which Lou grabbed and started washing herself.

Cody pulled out the small amount of shampoo they had and started washing his hair. It felt so good to finally shower.

Lou passed the soap to Cody in swap of the shampoo. She squeezed a small amount on her hand and started scrubbing washing her hair. She wished she could stay under the hot water all day, she hadn't felt this good in ages.

"Well, look at what we have here." A man's voice sung as he and another walked into the shower with towels around their waste.

Cody immediately placed himself in front of Lou and started to back her up against the wall of the shower.

This however gave the two men a reason to pick on them. They were about to have a little fun at these two expense.

Stupid, stupid, stupid, Cody kept repeating in his head. He shouldn't have bought them here.

"Now come on boy, you can't go dangling a piece of meat out in the open and not expect others to want to share."

"_Cody,"_ Lou whimpered behind him.

He wanted to comfort her, but he could not take his eyes of the men in front of him.

"We were just using the shower. Please we will be out of your way in a minute."

"Did you pay to use the shower? Are you a member here at the gym?" One asked as he reached his hand out to try and have a touch of Lou, hoping to get a bite out of the young male.

Cody pushed his hand away, "Don't touch her." He sneered, making the two men laugh.

In one quick movement Cody was ripped away from Lou. Lou screamed out while Cody started throwing punches.

Lou quickly tried to escape, so she could at least get some clothes on and help Cody out. But she was grabbed around the waist. "Let me go," she screamed, as she tried struggling out of his arms.

"You're a tiny wee thing aint' ya?" the guy laughed, "How old are you girl?" he asked as his hands roamed the body that was in them. Yes he only wanted some fun but now that her naked wet body was in his hands something else took over.

Lou started breaking down in sobs, as she closed her eyes and started whispering, _"Not again, not again, not again, not again," _over and over again. She was sick and she was scared, she had no energy left in her to fight.

The man that held her dropped her like she had burnt him. He stood there staring at the girl he could now see was only a child. His eyes went to the dirty pile of clothes and the small amount of things that she and the boy had with them.

They were street kids.

"Hay, Mack, let the boy go," he turned telling his friend but he saw that his friend was now staring down at the sorry sight of the young girl as well.

"_Not again, not again, not again,"_ was all she kept whimpering.

Cody slid next to her. Her words sending chills down his spine. "Not again," Had she been hurt in the past? Had Wick's done more than raise his hand to her?

Crying as he watched her fall apart, he didn't know what to do. He looked to his attacker as of only minutes ago, for answers but they were just as shell shocked as Cody.

"Lou its Cody," he begun. "No one is going to hurt you, you're safe." He cried, scared for his friend. "Lou, please, let me help you." He reached a shaky hand out to her arm and touched her skin, her eyes shot open to meet his.

"Cody,"

"Yeah sweetheart." Lou flew into him wrapping her arms tight around his neck. She thought the tighter she held onto him the safer she would feel.

The two men looked on with pity and self disgust. They could not believe that they were going to have a little fun with these two.

"You two get finished up here, we'll make sure no one else bothers you." One of the men told Cody.

Cody muttered his thanks, as he helped Lou to her feet. She still had a hair full of shampoo. So he took her over to the shower and helped her wash it out.

She looked up at him with her big brown eyes, tears streaming steadily down her cheeks, "I'm so tired Cody,"

"I know Lou. I promise you can sleep just as soon as we leave here." He told her heartbrokenly as he knew that they would be back on those damn cardboard boxes instead of a warm bed.

He helped her dry off and dress her in the clean clothes.

As they were walking out the two men stopped Cody. "We're truly sorry. We were trying to have some fun, didn't think."

Cody just nodded his head, he didn't care that they were sorry now, the damage was done.

Cody walked him and Lou to the nearest shelter, but it was already full. He didn't like rushing Lou while she was unwell and upset but he had too if they were sleeping in doors tonight.

Much to Cody's disgust no one would take them in. The day had turned from cold to freezing, and every shelter was full to the brim.

He knew that Lou was sicker than what she let on so staying out in the cold was not an option. "Come on Lou we have to find somewhere before it gets dark."

Two hours of walking and an emotional day Lou didn't think she could go on any longer. She was exhausted and she was sick. Her chest hurt with every cold breath she took and her head was pounding.

Cody grabbed her clammy hand and pulled her along with him. He would find them somewhere to stay even it meant that he had to beg for it.

Lou felt dead on her feet another hour on. She wouldn't dare complain as she saw the determination on Cody's face. She did not want to let him down.

But it didn't matter another thirty minutes on, her body had had enough and it slumped down to the ground.

"Shit Lou," Cody yelled as he leant over her. Her breathing was shallow and her head was hot to touch. "I'm sorry, Lou," Cody cried as the first snow flake fell lightly from the sky.

He felt like a failure, he had let her down when she needed him the most. Now they were on the other side of town in a suburb he did not know.

"Are you alright Son?" A rough voice asked.

Cody spun around to see an elderly gentlemen standing behind him.

"My sister, she is sick." He cried, "We have nowhere to go,"

The old man leant over Lou, just like Cody had. He could see the young lass was not well. "Well let's get her up off the wet ground," the old man said as he leant down to pick her up. She looked to be the same age as his granddaughter, what on earth are these children doing out here? He thought to himself.

"Don't touch her." Cody suddenly panicked. The man raised his hands up in surrender not wanting to upset the young man.

"Well Son you pick her up and follow me." The old man said.

Cody did as the man asked, not believing how light she was, and followed behind the man.

The man led Cody to his small house. He pulled his keys out and opened his home to the young ones, hoping and praying that it won't bite him on the ass.

"You might want to get her out of those wet clothes. She can have one of my shirts, while we put her clothes in the dryer. You can use the spare bedroom, third door on right down the hallway."

Cody nodded and carried Lou down to the bedroom, while the man followed. Cody hoped that the man didn't think he was going to watch while Cody changed Lou out of her things.

"I'll get you that shirt," Said the old man sensing Cody was panicking about something. He went into his own room which was on the left hand side of the hallway.

"Thanks," Cody muttered as he walked in the room he was told and lay Lou on the bed.

He started taking off of her boots. Fat lot of use they are, her socks were soaked through. "Here you go son," the older man said handing a shirt to Cody and a pair of socks. "When you are done bring her wet clothing and meet me in the lounge room."

"Ok, thank you." Cody replied as he pulled Lou's last sock off.

The older gentle men left the room pulling the door behind him. Cody carefully pulled the rest of Lou's clothes off and placed the dry shirt on her instead.

He couldn't stop thinking about earlier. Had Lou been hurt while she was with him, did he fail her more than what he already knew? Or had this happened before Cody found her? Either way it was not good enough.

He pulled back the covers on the bed and placed Lou between them.

"Cody," Lou asked confused.

"Just rest Lou, you are safe." He told her, to which she just accepted. She knew that Cody wouldn't place her in any un-necessary danger.

Cody watched Lou's eyes drift asleep once again. He leant down and kissed her forehead loving that she was in a bed.

He walked out of the room with Lou's clothes in hand and went to say thank you to the old guy that had saved them.

"What's your name Son?"

"Cody," was all the young boy said.

"Well Cody my name is William Tompkins, you can call me Will."

"I don't know how to thank you Will."

"Do you want to tell me how you and your friend came to be here?" Will asked quizzing the boy, to see if he lied about the young girl being his sister.

Of course when Cody spilled his guts on everything that had happened in the past, Will did not care that the boy had lied. It was obvious to him that he lied to protect her, and that was admiral in his eyes.

Cody then told him of his plan to wait at the home, to see if any of the boys show up to collect Lou. Cody knew that they would, he just hoped he was welcome to where ever they would go.

"I think that is a fine plan son, you and Lou are more than welcome to stay here until then. You can do a few jobs around the house for me to pay me back."

"That would be great."

So it was settled, Cody and Lou had a roof over their heads for the next few weeks.

Lou spent the following two days in bed. Will loved having Lou in the house. It had been a long time since he had heard the soft laughs of a girl. He wished that his Granddaughter, Jenny, would visit more often. But she was busy saving the world, and had hardly any spare time for him.

Cody helped out by clearing the back yard of all its rubbish, and cleaning out the guttering and drains before the bad weather really settled in.

Before they knew it there was only a week before Lou's birthday. Will had given her an early birthday present, some money to buy herself some clothes. She hugged him and kissed his cheek thanking him for all he had done.

She hoped that one day she would be able to return the favour and watch after him.

"Well how bout I drop you kids in town, and you two can catch a bus back?" Will offered, to which the two kids agreed.

Cody had never seen this side of Lou. She was happy.

After being dropped off the two friends went in search of some clothes for Lou. Cody hoped that she wouldn't buy a dress or something stupid, that wouldn't keep her warm.

"Do you think that they think of us?" Lou asked out of nowhere. Cody didn't have to ask who she was talking about, with the thought of meeting up with the boys in less than a week, that is all they both thought about.

Cody looked down at Lou who was trying to look like she didn't really care, but Cody knew that she was worried that they wouldn't come back for them.

"I think that they think about you every single day." He told her truthfully, and he did believe that the boys did, though he knew that the boys would be anything but pleased with him.

Cody had been meaning to talk about what Lou had said with their encounter with the men at the gym. No moment ever seemed good enough, but he thought since they were alone, without Will, she may open up.

"Lou I have wanted to ask you about..." Cody started but was cut off by a loud voice.

"Yo Cody," Lou and Cody turned to see who had called Cody's name.

"Tommy?" Cody questioned. He hadn't seen his friend since that night at Wick's. That thought alone had him grabbing a hold of Lou's hand.

"Cody?" It was Lou's turn to question him.

"It's all right Lou, just got a feeling is all." He told her giving her hand a squeeze. Lou knew that it mustn't be a good feeling to be acting the way he is.

"You know you caused a lot of trouble leaving like you did." Tommy stated coming closer. Cody didn't like the tone in his old friend's voice.

"Not trouble for you I hope." Cody asked

"No actually it was the best thing that could have happened to me." Cody narrowed his eyes at Tommy, where was he going with this.

"I got a promotion, started making some real money, while you've..." He looked Lou up and down, "Been slumming it with Wicks' girl," he sneered in disgust.

"She was never his. He was meant to be her foster dad..." Tommy laughed cutting Cody off.

"He truly is a sick man then," he continued to laugh. Cody didn't get what he meant, but Lou did.

Lou knew exactly what kind of mind Wicks' has.

"We've been looking for you for a while now," Tommy begun walking closer to Cody. Lou gripped Cody's hand tighter and leaned into him a tiny bit more.

Cody went to pull her behind him, but something, or rather someone caught his attention. Cody went to react but it was all too late.

Tommy and some of Wicks' men had gathered around Lou and Cody. Cody was going to get a beat down, for that he was sure of, he just didn't know where Lou was going to end up in all of this.


	3. Chapter 3

**I do not own the Young Riders**

* * *

><p>"Where are they?" Will asked himself for the hundredth time.<p>

He would have thought they would have been back hours ago. And while he knew girls liked to shop, he didn't think Lou was one of those girls.

He watched the clock on the wall, thinking to himself, five more minutes; they will be home in five more minutes.

Then something occurred to him, what if they spent all the money and were walking back home? He didn't give them change for the bus stop, how stupid of him.

Will sat there and tried to think of how long it would take to walk home from town. He was guessing two hours give or take. He looked at his watch noticing they had been gone for four. Deciding that he should wait another hour he started to prepare dinner for them all.

Over an hour later he couldn't sit still. He got in his car and started scanning the streets for them. He had a strange feeling something had happened, and he was too late.

It was now eleven o'clock at night and Will had looked everywhere he could think of. Feeling utterly useless he headed back home to try ringing the hospitals. He knew Lou was technically a runaway so he could not risk calling the police just yet.

He got out of his car and headed for the front door, the sound of his phone ringing had him quickly scrimmaging for his front door key.

'Don't hung up, don't hung up,' he kept repeating to himself.

As quick as he could he ran and answered the phone.

"Hello," He rushed out, but nothing came from the other side.

"Hello, Cody, Lou. Is that you?" he asked desperately.

A small yet noticeable whimpering came down the phone. He knew in his heart that it was Lou. It was only soft, until a sob escaped her.

"Lou, what's wrong? Where are you sweetheart?" Will asked panicking that something was seriously wrong.

"_I don't know."_ Lou cried hopelessly on the other end.

"Lou look around you, tell me anything you can, I will come and get you." Will told her. He was wondering why Cody hadn't come to the phone if Lou was too distraught to talk.

"Lou put Cody on, is he there with you?" And the line went dead.

Will stood there feeling so utterly useless. He knew that Lou and Cody must be in some real trouble and he had no clue as to where to start looking.

* * *

><p>A week dragged on for all those who were waiting for Lou's birthday. Jimmy, Buck, Kid and Ike were all dying to see their friend hoping that she was at the home to meet them.<p>

Will was just praying to his god that both Cody and Lou were alright enough to stick with their plan to wait for their friends outside of the home on Lou's birthday.

"Where is she?" Jimmy asked no one in particular as he paced back and forth.

"Jimmy it's her birthday today, where ever she is may take her a couple of days to show, just settle down."

"Kid's right son, ya gunna wear yourself out if you don't stop." Teaspoon laughed.

These boys were the best thing that had ever happened to he and Rachel, and he was looking forward to finally getting to meet Lou as well.

Teaspoon bought all the boys to Seattle, as there was no way that any of them would stay behind. They were devastated when Lou had been adopted out, and that their friend Cody had decided to take off.

Ike however was a delight, and so thankful to have been taken out of the home. Teaspoon watched everyday in amazement as the boy came out of his shell.

When they first meet Ike he was timid and kept to himself, but now he is the complete opposite.

"Ah excuse me," An elderly man said, "You boys wouldn't be waiting on Cody and Lou would you?"

"How do you know that Mister?" Kid asked grabbing everyone's attention.

"My name is William Tompkins, Cody and Lou have been living with me these past few weeks."

"How are they together?" Jimmy inquired.

"That is not my story to tell. But they did find each other, and then I found them." Will smiled.

"Well where are they?" Jimmy snapped.

"Jimmy don't be rude." Teaspoon reprimanded.

"Teaspoon Hunter," Teaspoon held his hand out towards Will, to which he took and shook Teaspoons hand.

"Are the two with you?" Teaspoon asked a hell of a lot nicer than Jimmy.

"Sadly no." Will told him, "A week back they came into town, I had given Lou some money for her birthday, they never came back." Will told them sadly. "I had hoped that they would show up here, it was their plan all this time."

"I don't know the two, but if that has been their plan we just have to believe that it will happen." Teaspoon told them all. He could see that the boys were losing a little faith, and he wasn't having that, especially this early on.

The small group sat around and waited. Jimmy kept trying to get more information out of Will on hoe Lou and Cody ended up together. But Will kept the boy a bay, believing that it really wasn't his place to tell them.

Will's legs were becoming restless just sitting around, so he decided to stretch them a little. Walking around the small area they were waiting something caught his eye down the street.

"Cody?" He called out in question. Was it really him?

The others turned to look to where Will was staring.

Cody looked to his friends hoping like hell Lou was with them. "Cody," Will called again as he started to walk up to him.

Once Will was standing in front of Cody, he could see the boy was in a bad way. Bruises littered his face, his arm was in a cast and he looked like he hadn't slept in days.

Will pulled the boy in for a hug, what had happened? And where was Lou?

"Oh Will, I can't find her." The boy cried. By this time the others had joined the two.

Buck was shocked that this was Cody. For as long as he has known him he has never seen him cry, or look so skinny.

Teaspoon could see that Jimmy's temper was about to get the better of him, so he tugged on his arm, pulling the boy back, shaking his head no.

"Give the boy a minute," Teaspoon demanded.

"Why Cody, what happened? Who did this to you?" Will asked shocked that these bruises were from a week ago.

"Tommy, Wicks'..." he sobbed, turning William's blood cold. "They found us. I couldn't stop them. They started attacking us, Lou she was..." Cody's sobs were scaring Will, "She...I was trying to not let them get to her, but they did. I was pulled away, and she was behind me. They kept hitting her and hitting her, and I couldn't do anything." Cody wiped his tears, not embarrassed by them, but just because they were blurring his vision.

"Lou was screaming for help, she was screaming so loud, but it worked people came to our aid. Tommy though had a knife; I was too busy watching Lou I didn't see what was happening until I felt the knife go into my side. Lou she screamed as she saw what Tommy had done. I didn't know what he was capable of so I told Lou to run, to run and hide and I would find her."

"Will she was in a bad way, what if something..."

"Don't think it Cody. Lou rung me that night, so I know she was alright then. We know Lou is strong and most likely on her way here. That was the plan; she will stick to the plan." Will reassured Cody and himself.

It was then though that Will remembered that they were not alone. He pulled away from Cody to have a look at the other boys who had probably heard all of that and were worried too.

"Cody," One of them cried.

"Kid?" Cody looked at all his friends, not believing that they were all here. "What happened to you?" Kid asked.

"I-I..." Cody didn't even know where to begin. His mind was on Lou, and only Lou.

"Where were you? And where the hell is Lou?" Jimmy asked angrily.

"I'm not going to apologise for leaving. If I hadn't then I wouldn't have found Lou." Which was true. "And as of Lou, I don't know." He said helplessly.

"If she is hu..." Will cut Jimmy off. He didn't think Cody needed to be threatened, and like hell was he letting it happen here and now, in front of him.

"Cody are you sure you don't have any idea where she is gone?" Will asked, trying to keep his panic at bay.

"I have spent the last few days going over and over where she maybe, but nothing I'm starting to..." Cody's voice trailed off as a small figure caught his eye over Will's shoulder.

"LOU?" Cody yelled as he damn near pushed Will out of the way. "Lou," he could really see her now, see that it was her, and that she was safe.

Kid, Jimmy, Buck and Ike all took a step forward to follow Cody's line of vision.

"Cody," she cried as she flung herself into his arms. "I thought you were dead, I thought I would never see you again." She continued to cry. Cody held her tight, even though his body was protesting, he was just happy to have her in his arms again.

"Lou I have been looking everywhere for you," He held her out at arms lengths seeing that she too had bruises, but she also looked grey and around her eyes were dark. "When was the last time you ate?" he asked her seriously.

"Cody, I'm alright." She tried to reassure him. She didn't want to stress him anymore than she already had. "I'm just so glad that your ok, I have been so worried." She cried. Cody reached out his fingers and swept her tears away.

"Lou," Kid's voice called out, breaking hers and Cody's moment.

That had Lou spinning as quick as she could, of course with her lack of food her legs stumbled slightly, but Cody held her up. "Lou?" He asked worried.

"I'm alright," she told Cody. And she was, she finally had everyone back together.

Lou saw that all the boys were here. Stumbling towards them all she wrapped her arms around the closest one, Ike.

Holding him she cried and she cried. Never did she think that she would ever see them again. Ike just held her and cried as well.

How he wanted to tell her that it was all going to be ok, that they were going to take her and Cody to live with them on the ranch. But he held her as they wept together, just thankful that she was alright.

"Stop hogging her Ike." Kid joked pulling Lou away from him to get his own hug, before Buck and Jimmy had their turn.

"You ok?" Jimmy asked as he hugged her tight.

Lou nodded in his shoulder but also muttered, "I am now."

Jimmy didn't want to let her go. It had been far too long since he had seen her he just wanted to hold her for the rest of the day.

"Lou?" Will questioned, wanting his turn with her. "Happy Birthday sweetheart," he smiled. Lou walked over to him, stumbling again but this time nearly connecting with the ground. Will got to her first and pulled her up into his arms.

"You alright sweetheart?"

"I'm tired, stinky and hungry." Lou told him truthfully.

"Well why don't we head home and you and your friends can catch up, and we can get you something to eat and a hot shower?" Will suggested but was looking to everyone else to see if they were ok with that.

"Please," was all Lou said as she continued to hold onto Will.

Teaspoon got some directions off of Will and said he would follow him to his house. The boys had hoped Lou and Cody would ride with them, but there was no way Lou was letting go of Will at the moment.

Getting back to Teaspoon's truck, the boys were speechless. It was abundantly clear that their two friends had both lived through a hell of an ordeal, and that they were a part of a world that the rest of them had no idea about.

"You boys sure are quiet." Teaspoon stated as he followed Will's directions.

"We should have never left them," Buck stated as he stared out the window. He didn't like the way Cody's face had hardened. He looked older than he was meant to be.

"You did the right thing." Teaspoon told them, "If you didn't then you would have been in the same boat as Lou and Cody." Teaspoon shuddered at the thought. He hoped that he would never see any of his boys beaten they way Cody had been, or Lou for that matter.

"I want to know how they came to be with each other." Jimmy grumbled.

"Does it matter," Ike signed. He didn't think it did, he liked that they were together all this time.

"Your right Ike it shouldn't matter, I just feel like I have let them both down." Jimmy said as he stared out the window. He was the oldest he should be their protector.

"They're both so skinny," Kid said shaking his head. There was nothing to Lou when he hugged her.

Teaspoon pulled up to the house to see Will was at the door waiting for them. "I'll tell you something boys, Lou and Cody are damn lucky they found Will." And it was true. Teaspoon could see that the old guy cared about the two kids.

"Please come in, Cody is just helping Lou, they should be out in a minute." The boys all followed Teaspoon in and took various seats around the living room.

Cody and Lou were in the bathroom, both taking their turns in showering. Cody went first while Lou brushed her teeth. She felt so disgusting and couldn't wait for the spray of the hot water.

Cody got out while leaving the water running. He wrapped his towel around himself while Lou shed her clothes.

"Jesus Lou," Cody couldn't help but hiss. She thought he was talking about her bruises but when he touched her hip bones, she knew it was because of the amount of weight she had lost. "Have you eaten at all?" He asked.

"I couldn't," she told him. Her stomach was in knots with worry for him that she just couldn't face food. Cody was about to fire her with thousands of questions, but a knock on the door had him distracted for the time being.

"I'm coming," Cody called out while Lou slipped into the shower. And just like she thought it would be, it was bliss.

Quickly changing into some clothes that he had at Will's, Cody dropped some in the bathroom for Lou, before heading out to join the firing squad.

"Cody come and grab a sandwich first, then you can talk." Will called from the kitchen. Cody agreed and walked in to see Will making a pot of coffee and a plate of biscuits for everyone else.

"She is so skinny," Cody told Will as he took a bite of his sandwich. Of course Will wanted to tell him that she was not the only one, but he bit his tongue.

"She will be alright Cody," Will told him, believing that she will be, but upset all the same.

"Can I have one please?" Lou's small voice asked as she stepped into the kitchen, with her hair still wet, but one of Will's clean shirts and a pair of track pants that she still had here.

"Of course you can sweetheart." Will handed Lou a plate with a sandwich on it as well. "Why don't you take that into the lounge where your friends are waiting."

Lou said her thanks and did as he suggested. But for the first time in her life Lou was embarrassed by her appearance. She may have had a shower, and had clean clothes on but she has never felt so ugly than what she does now.

It is not at all how she imagined ever seeing the boys again. Shaking her head she walked through to the lounge.

"Lou," all the boys said as she wandered in and over to a spare chair.

"Hi," she smiled to Teaspoon, not knowing who he is.

"Lou, Cody," Buck started. Lou saw that Cody had slipped into the living room as well. "This is Teaspoon. He took us all in and has given us a job and a place to live."

"He owns a huge ranch near Wyoming. He has horses and a few hundred cattle. His wife Rachel and he have said that you two can come live there as well." Kid finished for Buck.

Cody sat next to Lou, and sternly told her to eat. Sighing she started picking at the edges of the sandwich. Will came in carrying his tray of biscuits and coffee, offering everyone something.

"Lou, Cody, my wife Rachel, and I, would love for you two to join us as well. I'm not going to lie, the work is hard, but the pay and living quarters are good." Teaspoon told the two kids truthfully.

Lou was excited at what she had heard so far. She would love to move away from the city and start a new life. But she didn't voice her excitement, as Lou was waiting to hear what Cody wanted to do. No matter what she wasn't leaving him, he was her saving grace and she couldn't live a day without seeing him.

"It's a huge change," Cody stated, "I mean, the country? I think I would be lost without the concrete." He tried to joke.

Lou felt a little disappointed. She had hoped Cody would have jumped at the chance for a new way of life, but no matter what she would choose the same path as he. She kept quiet though and placed her half eaten sandwich to the side of her. She was full, having just eaten the most she had in days.

"What about you Lou?" Teaspoon asked. Jimmy and the other boys thought it was strange that he asked her; of course Lou was coming with them.

"I...ah...I want to go where Cody goes." She told them honestly.

"Are you two together?" Buck asked looking between the two.

"No but he's home to me. Where ever Cody is, I want to be there with him." Cody beamed with importance, he and Lou were closer than any other two here, he felt the same way about her, there was no way they could be apart for too long.

But before he made a decision he needed to talk to her, find out where her head is, cos at the end of the day it's all about her.

"Lou can I talk to you for a minute, alone?" Cody asked as he stood up ready to leave the room. Of course he knew Lou would agree, so when she just stood without saying a thing he smiled.

Walking to the room that they shared when they stayed with Will, Cody sat on the bed pulling Lou down with him.

"Where were you?" Cody asked, dying to know where she had hidden.

"I stayed under the old bridge near the park for the first few nights, but then Garrett and Nancy found me, and I tagged along with them." Cody shuddered thinking of Lou under that bridge by herself. He never thought to look there as he didn't think Lou would go there.

"How bad were you?" He asked her seriously, standing from the bed.

"Not as bad as you." She told him, but he wasn't about to have that, of course Lou being Lou wouldn't give him a chance to complain. She lifted his shirt to see the stab wound, "When I saw Tommy put that knife in..." She couldn't finish, she just swallowed hard and carried on. "I was so scared Cody, so scared." She admitted as her fingers ghosted over the wound.

"I'm sorry you had to see that, but I am ok." He smiled as he pulled his shirt down.

"I want you to tell me what you want to do. If you want to move to the country with the rest, I will come with you, this is your decision." Cody told her honestly. He had no clue if the country was for him, but he would give it a go for Lou's sake.

Lou looked at Cody, wishing she knew what it was he wanted her to pick. She didn't want to make this decision, because if Cody hated the country and Lou loved it, she knew Cody would leave. But if they were to stay in the city, she didn't know if she could cope with having to look over her shoulder all the time.

"I want to go with the others," She told him looking down at the floor.

Cody lifted her chin not liking her looking down. "Then we will go with them. Lou there aint a wrong choice here, don't feel bad."

Cody leant down and kissed her on the mouth, he doesn't know what made him do it, but he did it all the same.

At first Lou was shocked, but soon found herself opening her mouth for him.

Cody deepened the kiss, closing his eyes, waiting for some sort of feeling to hit him. He wanted so bad to feel that way about Lou, but it just wasn't there.

Pulling back, he opened his eyes to see Lou's eyes were dancing with humour.

"Anything?" Cody asked.

"Nope." Lou smiled, but she knew there wouldn't be any way. "But it was still nice, thank you." She giggled.

"Come on then," he pulled her up and off of the bed, ready to tell the others what their decision was.

Joining the others Cody announced that Lou and he would both head back to Wyoming with the rest of them, if it was alright with Teaspoon.

"Of course it is son." Teaspoon beamed. He knew that Rachel was going to be over the moon.

"What about you Will, can you move to the country too?" Lou asked as she walked over and sat next to him. She leaned her head so it was resting on his shoulder, her fatigue finally catching up with her.

"I would love to Lou, but my life is here." Will told her leaning his head down to hers.

"Maybe I could come visit you, and you come to us," Lou suggested, hoping that she would see Will again.

Cody came to sit next to Lou, also saddened that they were leaving Will. "You can visit me anytime you like sweetheart," Will kissed Lou on the head,

"So Cody, do you want to tell us what you two have been doing this past year?" Jimmy asked, dying to know.

Lou settled her head down in Cody's lap, her eyes no longer able to stay awake. Will got up out of his chair and fetched her a blanket, before starting some supper for everyone, he didn't need to hear about the troubles Cody and Lou had had again, once was enough.

Cody played with Lou's long hair, wrapping it around his fingers, brushing it away from her face, while he relayed the troubles that they had been in. Of course he kept a bit to himself as well; something's don't need to be repeated.

Ike cursed himself when he learnt about Wicks, not that Cody told them of his suspicions of what might have happened there, Ike had gotten a bad feeling when Wicks had picked Lou up from the home, he should have listened to his gut, and put up a fuss.

Though back then Ike didn't have the back bone that he does now. Being with Teaspoon and Rachel had changed his life for the better. He had no desire to ever return to the city.

"Cody why don't you go put Lou to bed. It doesn't look like she's waking any time soon." Will stated as he came back into the room, "Teaspoon, boys, I have prepared some food in the dining room if you care to come have something to eat."

"Why thank you Will," Teaspoon said as he got up out of the chair feeling rather famished.

He wondered why he seemed to be the only one heading in that direction, he looked to his boys to see that they all had their eyes trained on Cody and Lou.

"Come on boys let Cody take Lou to her room, come and grab some food." Teaspoon told Jimmy and the others. He knew that they were worried for their friends, but he also knew that the young girl needed to sleep.

The atmosphere was strange to say the least. Teaspoon knew that there were going to be some teething problems to begin with as the boys had all grown in the past year. But he hoped that it would work, and he hoped that Lou would be happy in the country.

Another hour later and Teaspoon had to announce that they needed to get moving. It was getting late and he needed to get to his brothers place.

"Please you're more than welcome to stay here." Will told Teaspoon.

"Thank you all the same, but my brother Sam lives here, he will be expecting us." Teaspoon replied.

"Lou and I want to stay with Will tonight, is that ok Teaspoon?" Cody asked politely, and causing Jimmy to scowl in his direction.

"Sure it is. We will come collect you in the morning." Teaspoon agreed.

"Make sure your here." Jimmy warned Cody.

"Jimmy, in the truck." Teaspoon warned Jimmy in return.

After they left Cody helped Will tidy the dishes up, and put some washing on before he too headed for bed. "Ah Cody, can I talk to you for a minute?" Will asked.

Sighing to himself he knew that this conversation had to happen. He walked back into the lounge and sat opposite Will in the big brown armchair.

"You know you can come to me for anything?" Will queried, to which Cody nodded. "Then why didn't you contact me? I would have helped you look for Lou. You didn't need to do that all yourself even more so because of the shape you are in."

"I'm sorry Will. I just wanted to keep you out of it in case you were seen with me or Lou. Wicks' is a sick man, who knows what he is capable of."

"I can understand that you want to protect me Cody, but you have no idea how this past week has been for me, how worried I was for the both of you. After Lou rung me...I have never felt that useless in my life." Will admitted.

"I think I know of how this past week has been for you Will. The sick feeling I got when I awoke to remember Lou wasn't with me." Cody's lip trembled as he spoke of his fears. "Lou and I have not gone one day apart for over a year, not one day. I have walked these streets trying to find her, wanting my other half back." He looked up to the ceiling hoping that his tears would somehow roll back into his eyes. "She keeps telling me that she thought I was dead, I thought she was dead. Or worse, I thought she was back with Wicks'."

"You love her." Will stated.

"I love her more than I have ever loved anyone or anything, but I aunt in love with her if that is what you mean." Cody told Will with conviction.

"She's your best friend," Will agreed, but the words just didn't seem enough for Cody, the words didn't sound as important as what his feeling towards her were.

Saying their goodnights Cody slipped into the bed with Lou. He held her tight and prayed that he could live in the country for her.


	4. Chapter 4

**I do not own the Young Riders.**

After Will spent the morning promising Lou that he will visit her in the summer he hugged her and lead her to where Teaspoon and the boys were waiting.

"I want to thank you for everything that you have done for me and Lou." Cody said as he held his hand out to Will.

"It wasn't much Cody." Will told him as he shook the young man's hand.

"You know as well as I do that if Lou and I had been out in that cold weather for much longer we wouldn't have survived."

"But you did son, you survived so don't waste this second chance. You both deserve happiness so let people in, give the country life a go."

"I promise."

Lou cried as she watched the silhouette of Will become smaller and smaller. Cody placed his arm around her and allowed her to cry into his shoulder. The other boys looked on with a pang of jealousy.

The ride was long and took a few days. Jimmy, Buck and Kid all took turns sharing the driving with Teaspoon. Cody asked Teaspoon if he would mind teaching him to drive when they got to the ranch.

"Of course not Son." Teaspoon responded only too happy to teach Cody to drive. He was guessing that these two kids had missed out on doing a lot this past year. "Is there anything else you two would like to do?" Lou and Cody looked to each other not really knowing what he was meaning. "Rachel and I would love for you to both help us on the ranch but if there was something else you preferred to do, other line of work we could help you find that in town."

"I'm happy to work the farm, but I would be open to other options as well." Cody replied. He didn't have any experience in anything other than drug running and he didn't think that was what Teaspoon was talking about.

"Well we can keep an eye out for any jobs that are going in town, see if any take your fancy," Teaspoon told Cody, happy that the boy seemed keen to work.

"What about you Lou?" Teaspoon asked, hoping that Lou would come out of her shell a bit. Teaspoon didn't like how dependant she was on Cody, and the fact that he saw that the two of them had shared a bed the last two nights, didn't sit right with him.

Teaspoon had heard Cody swearing to the other boys that he and Lou were not together in any sort of romantic way, he didn't know if the boy was lying, or if the two friends were just comforting each other. Either way he would have to put an end to it when they got home.

"I want to finish school," the small voice of Lou replied after a while.

Teaspoon and Jimmy who were both in the front turned to look at her, while Cody squeezed her hand in encouragement.

"You didn't finish school Lou?" Jimmy inquired while giving Cody a filthy look.

"What Jimmy?" Cody snapped. He knew Jimmy would blame him for everything Lou didn't get to do.

"I just would have thought you would have made sure Lou finished school. That is all."

"Oh and when was I supposed to fit that in? We had no money, no clothes and no damn roof over our heads how in the hell did you expect us to finish school."

"You didn't finish either Cody?" Teaspoon asked, to which Cody shook his head no. Lou bit her lip to stop it from trembling. She was embarrassed and she was upset that she had bought the subject up.

The tears were coming in fast and thick and Lou tried with all her might to will them back in. She turned to look out the window, but her watery eyes found Buck's.

Buck hating that Lou was upset went to wipe her tears from her face, but as he raised his hand Lou flinched back from his touch.

Buck's hand stayed frozen in the air, his face shocked and hurt that Lou would even think that he would hurt her.

No one else saw this interaction as they were all yelling and screaming at Cody and Jimmy, just Lou and Buck sat and stared at each other.

Buck shook his head, his lips moved but nothing came out. He had no idea what to say to her.

"Lou are you even listening to me?" Kid snapped. Lou turned her head and looked at Kid having no idea what he was on about.

"When did you stop going to school?" He asked annoyed.

"I can't really remember." She answered truthfully. "I think I was in the 10th grade when I stopped going." Cody was even shocked by this. He met up with Lou when she was just turning seventeen, surely she would have had to been a junior.

Lou could feel everyone's eyes on her. She bit her lip once again and started playing with the hem of her shirt.

Teaspoon could see that Lou hated this whole conversation. He knew that it must have taken a lot of courage to admit she hadn't finished her schooling, and these boys were making her feel worse by arguing.

"Well honey I have no idea how we go about doing that, but I'm sure there is a way we can get you to finish school." Teaspoon told her. He knew that Rachel would know hell she could probably teach Lou from home.

Cody was going through everything in his mind, he knew the reason why Lou didn't go to school, Wicks'. But why wouldn't he allow her to go to school? Cody looked down to Lou to see she had been crying. He squeezed her hand again letting her know that he was there.

Ike sat in the back watching his brothers and Lou. He could see that she was still in a bad place. Just like she was the day she was adopted out.

He would never forget that day.

He had heard about Cody taking off from some boys that were discussing it outside Ike's bunk room, and was hurt that Cody wouldn't say good bye to him. Ike had thought Cody cared for him like he did for Cody. Cody was Ike's brother in every way but in blood, so why wouldn't he say goodbye.

Ike was in his room brooding when Lou came running in with tear filled eyes. "Ike they are sending me away again, I don't know if I can go through another home." She cried while clinging to Ike. "I have nothing left to give Ike, I have nothing." Ike stroked her hair as she sobbed, he wanted to give her words of encouragement but he didn't have anything to give either.

"There is a gaping hole in my chest where my heart once was. I don't think I have any love in there to give that is why no one can give any back to me."

Ike whimpered as he listened to Lou cry out. She was hurting more than any of them knew. Ike quickly thought that he could take off with Lou, run away like Cody had.

Ike shook the memory from his head not wanting to get lost in anymore.

Ike looked from Lou to Cody, seeing that Cody was comforting Lou. This pissed Ike off. Cody left them there, he walked away from them all and all of a sudden he's welcomed back, what a crock of shit.

Ike kicked the back of Cody's chair. He wasn't about to let this slide, Cody had to know what he had done.

"What the hell Ike?"

"You left us." Ike signed angrily. He pointed his finger at Cody, "YOU"

Cody was taken back at the look of anger on Ike's face. He didn't know what to say.

Jimmy pulled the truck over, he wanted his say and he couldn't do that and drive safely. Teaspoon was trying to intervene, but then threw his arms up at a lost cause. The boys needed to air out their frustrations and he would rather they do it here than in front of Rachel.

"Cody you had only a few months left, hell not even that it must have only been weeks, why the hell did you do it?"

"Kid I didn't want to work on no damn farm, you may have been happy but that life was not going to be mine. I felt like you had taken a choice away from me. You should have talked to all of us and we should have made the decision together."

"So you ran away like a sulking child. Cody did it really matter what we were doing and where? I thought the whole idea was that as long as we were together."

"Even if I waited a few weeks Lou and Ike would have been still alone."

"They would have had each other."

"That is where you are wrong." Cody snapped back. "Ike would have been in that home by himself while Lou would have been in that hell hole I found her in."

"What I don't understand is why you didn't come look for us In Wyoming? You knew we were there."

"That's all we knew. If we were going to be homeless then I would rather it be in a town that we knew not some strange place."

Jimmy and Kid kept up on their verbal assault on Cody. Ike was starting to see why Cody had done what he had done, but there was still a strain in their friendship.

Lou had heard enough. Her head was pounding and all the yelling wasn't helping. She tapped Buck on the leg and indicated with her head that she wanted out of the truck. Buck didn't question he opened the door and slid out so Lou could slid out to.

"Lou you ok?" Buck asked concerned as he watched Lou pace around in circles on the side of the road. She was holding her hand to her head as she stressed about everything that was being said and yelled about. The tension was becoming all too much.

"This is not how I pictured our reunion." Lou said pointing towards the boys in the truck, who were still going at it. "I understand that you are all angry at Cody leaving, shit I was when I learnt about it. But he left and in the long run I am fucking lucky he did." Lou kicked at the gravel that laced the side of the road.

"I needed him, I still need him." Lou cried. "None of you will ever realise what he has done for me, how much he has sacrificed for me. Cody is not the bad guy," Lou turned towards the truck. "SO STOP YELLING AT HIM!" Lou screamed out, making everyone stop at once.

They all filed out of the truck and walked closer to where Buck and Lou were standing.

"Lou..." Cody begun but Lou cut him off real quick.

"No Cody, don't." Lou took a step closer to him, "Stop being an arrogant ass. It is not who you are anymore so please don't slip back into that person." Cody was taken aback by Lou's anger towards him. In his eyes he hadn't done anything wrong to warrant Lou's wrath. "The boys have a right to be angry with you, and if you stopped and listened to what they were saying you could see that it was a shitty thing for you to do, leaving that way." Cody went to protest but Lou was having none of that.

"I aint' finished." She looked to the other boys, "And if ya'll pull your heads out from your asses you would see that you were wrong too. Cody was right. Moving this far away should have been a group decision from the start."

"Lou we made a decision that was best for all of us."

"No you made a decision about what was best for you, and that is fine. You needed to survive. You did what you needed to do. No one should blame you for that." Lou said looking pointedly at Cody. The things he and she did to survive were a lot worse than moving states.

"But it was wrong." Lou said looking back to the boys.

"So you're saying you don't want to move with us?"

"No it's not what I'm saying. Life in the country sounds just what I need right now. But I know that if you had asked me over a year ago I would have said no. You told Cody and Ike that you were going and there was no

"Lou we're sorry..." Kid went to say, taking a step closer to her with his arms out.

Lou took a step back, while Cody took a step in front of Lou to stand between Kid and her. Kid frowned as he looked at the two. "What? I was only going to give you a hug." Lou hung her head once again feeling stupid. Of course that is what he was going to do. But with all the anger that had been thrown around she didn't want his touch. She had learnt the hard way that no one should ever touch anyone when they are angry.

"Oh I see, only Cody gets to do that." Kid hissed, "You know for two people that swear they aint' together you two sure act like you are."

"You would think that Kid." Cody crowed, pissing Kid off and moving his feet to stand toe to toe with Cody's.

"What do you mean by that?"

"Your old fashioned Kid, always have been always will be. You automatically think that if Lou and I share a hug or touch each other in certain way that we are together. God forbid if we kissed you would have us married off." Kid's eyes danced with Cody's. They were both waiting for the other to make a move or to say the wrong thing.

Teaspoon could see the mounting tension and decided to step in.

"I think the best thing to do is get back in the truck, people are starting to stop. You all need to talk this out and I'm thinking the best place will be at the ranch." Teaspoon said with reservation. He didn't want this drama for Rachel, he knew she would be upset by it all, but the side of the ride was no place for this to be happening.

Lou and the boys didn't argue. They all took their place back in the truck. No one said a thing to the other, leaving the last three hours of the trip a peaceful yet tension filled time.

Rachel was frantically fixing dinner, preparing another bed out in the bunkhouse and one inside the house. Every five minutes she would look out the window, or stop what she was doing thinking she heard the rumbling sound of Teaspoon's truck.

She was anxious to have her husband and the boys back, as well as being excited that two more would be joining the group. And although Rachel was a woman, she was worried about Lou coming here.

Rachel had no idea what a teenage girl was into, and she knew that when it came to women in general it takes them a lot longer to let people in. Rachel hoped that Lou could see that Teaspoon and her wanted Lou here.

Chicken pie was on the menu tonight, along with Rachel's famous apple crumble and vanilla ice cream, she hoped that Lou and Cody enjoyed her cooking just as much as the other boys.

Rachel couldn't believe that Lou and Cody had been homeless all this time. When Teaspoon rung letting her know what was going on, she was saddened to hear that two people whom her boys loved had, had such hard times.

Dusk was setting in and Rachel was becoming more nervous. She sat in front of the TV not watching it but just needing the noise. Her hands patted an anxious rhythm on her knees, while her eyes flicked from the grandfather clock and the big bay window.

Finally fifteen minutes later the glow of Teaspoon's truck lights came into view. Rachel jumped from her chair switched the TV off before running out the door to meet them.

As soon as Teaspoon exited the truck Rachel was in his arms. "Hello my Darlin'" Teaspoon laughed in her ear. Rachel pulled back and placed her hands either side of Teaspoon's head.

"You look tired," she stated, "God I've missed you," she smiled before kissing him tenderly on his lips.

Teaspoon half spun her and kissed her back forcefully on the mouth causing her to giggle and push him away. "Save it for later," she whispered into his ear.

Sighing in slight frustration, Teaspoon placed Rachel on her feet and turned her around to the boys and Cody and Lou.

"Rachel, this is Cody and Lou," Teaspoon said gesturing with his hands towards the two new faces.

"It's a pleasure to meet you both." Rachel smiled.

"You too Rachel," Cody replied, while Lou just smiled and gave a nervous wave.

"Well you all must be hungry, so why don't you come in, get washed up and I will dish you out some dinner?" The other boys didn't have to be told twice. They ran into the house and straight to the bathroom. They had missed Rachel's cooking and were looking forward to whatever she had planned.

Lou and Cody followed behind the rest, but a lot slower. Their eyes were looking around the huge home, taking all that they could in about the place. And they both came up with the same conclusion; it was the nicest house they had ever been in. It was the biggest house that they had ever been in.

The two storey home was made out of logs. It had huge windows that showed off the picturesque paddocks, the corral and the bunkhouse.

Inside was huge. The kitchen, dining and living were one big room. You could see the top landing from the living room, where the bedrooms all run off from. Lou and Cody were in awe.

"I don't think we're in Kansas anymore," Cody joked in Lou's ear making her laugh.

Although it was quiet, the meal seemed to be a success in Rachel's eyes. Nothing was left on anyone's plates and they all seemed eager for desert.

"So Lou how bout I show you where everything is and your room while the boys do the cleaning up."

Lou nodded and followed Rachel from the table. Rachel showed Lou around the house and then told her she could have the room opposite the bathroom.

"Uh I thought we slept out in the barn thingy." Lou said pointing towards the yard.

"The barn thingy is the bunkhouse and that is where the boys will sleep." Rachel told her with a smile.

"I want to sleep in there with them." Lou stated.

"You will be much happier in here." Rachel pointed out opening the door to the room.

The walls were covered in pink and white flowers, as was the bed spread. The curtains were white and frilly and the window over looked the yard. Actually that was the only thing that Lou liked about the room.

"Rachel please I would be much happier with the boys, or even if Cody stayed in here with me."

"Lou, I'm sorry sweetheart, but under my roof you and the boys won't be sharing a room." Rachel said lightly, sensing she was going to have a problem.

"Rachel with all due respect I aint' your daughter. I thought that we were here to work, do you tell your other employee's where they can sleep?"

"No you are not my daughter, which is a shame because I would take a switch to your behind for speaking to me in that manor if you were. You are here because Teaspoon and I love those boys out there, and they came to us pleading to bring you here. So you will show me some respect in my home and you will sleep where I tell you. Are we understood?"

"No I don't understand you at all nor do I wish to."

"LOU!" Cody shouted as he came barrelling into the room with everyone else on his heel. He could see by the look on Lou's face that she too had just found out that they wouldn't be sleeping in the same room. "Can you all get out so I can have a word with Lou alone?"

Rachel and Lou were still eyeing each other up. This was not how either of them had hoped this would have gone.

Teaspoon placed his arm around Rachel and led her out of the room, along with the boys. He could feel how tense Rachel's shoulders were so he knew that Lou and she had, had words just like he and Cody had.

Cody waited for the door to close before he pulled Lou down to the bed with him. He wrapped his arms around her tight already regretting his decision to come here.

"Looks like you and I are being separated again," He tried to say jokingly.

"Cody I don't think that I can sleep without you again. Not in this place. I don't know this place." Lou whimpered as her big eyes stared around the room.

"I know honey." He kissed the back of her head, while trying to think of some words of encouragement to get her through the night.

"Lou I am right across that yard. If you need me all you have to do is lift that window and holler and I will hear you and I will come running." Lou nodded her head not trusting her voice. "Good girl. We got to give this a go Lou."

Lou wanted to cry. She was the one who told Cody that she wanted to come here and now her insides were screaming at him to take them back to the city.

Cody continued to hold her for a while, he knew, like she did, that Teaspoon would be pulling Cody out of here if they were any longer.

Lou not wanting to make life hard for Cody did the only thing she could think of. She pretended that she was asleep. Lou evened out her breathing and tried relaxing her body further into the bed.

Cody lifted his head to see Lou's eyes were shut. He hoped that she stayed asleep for the remainder of the night.

He slipped his arms from beneath her, careful as to not wake her. Once free he stood over Lou flicking back a piece of hair that had fallen over her face. He hoped she could finally be at peace here. They were far enough away from the bright lights of the city, and hopefully the bad memories too.

Cody kissed Lou on the head before turning out the light and heading back down to where he was sure everyone was waiting.

Once Lou heard the snippet of the door her eyes sprung open.


	5. Chapter 5

**I do not own the Young Riders.**

**Warning Lou is going to go through a dark period. Not so much in this chapter, but it does begin at the end**

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><p>A week had past and Lou still hadn't come out of her shell. Rachel was thinking that she was being too harsh on the girl, and maybe she should have gone against her beliefs and let Lou and Cody sleep in the same room.<p>

But Teaspoon told her to stick to her guns.

Lou on the other hand was surviving off of nothing. She barely ate, she definitely wasn't sleeping. Every morning Rachel looked on in sadness as the lost girl walked down the stairs with her fake smile in place.

Rachel knew that Lou's turmoil was eating her alive but she could see the survivor in her, as she put a brave face on for the boys.

Did they not see the dark circles under Lou's empty eyes? Did they not see that her cheeks had hollowed out slightly and that her skin was greyer than pale?

Lou was making herself sick and Rachel could see that as clear as day.

"Morning Lou," Kid sung as he grabbed for some toast, "Good sleep?"

Lou tried to smile brightly as she nodded her head. She sat down in her spot between Cody and Buck. "You are going to eat this morning," Cody warned quietly in Lou's ear, but Buck and Ike had heard.

Lou looked to Cody almost defiantly. She hated it when he pushed food down her throat, she would eat when she was good and ready.

Lou placed her hands in her lap and just stared at her plate. The thought of food made her sick. She sat and she listened to Kid and Jimmy discussing what needed to be done this morning. Teaspoon had to go into town, so it was up to the boys to see that the chores were done.

"Cody did you hear me?" Jimmy asked, but Cody hadn't heard a darn thing he was still watching Lou, with temper that showed no sign of dulling.

"EAT!" he finally roared slamming his hands down hard on the oak table causing everyone to jump, including Lou.

"Cody..." Kid begun to protest but Cody held his palm out towards Kid,

"What the fuck is your problem?"

Lou was shocked by the way Cody had just spoken to her in front of everyone. "Well?" Cody snapped. "I mean this is where you wanted to be." Lou wouldn't look at him. She kept her eyes in her lap. "I get that you were upset that we couldn't share a room, hell it pissed me off to no end." Cody gave a quick sharp look to Rachel.

"But Lou starving yourself and acting like a spoilt brat aint going to change that fact. We have been here nearly a week, surely you can see that you are safe here, and that I am not going anywhere. We don't need to share a room for you to see that."

Lou felt the first tear hit her exposed wrist. She felt like her and Cody had drifted apart these last few days. And while she was surrounded in people she had never felt more alone.

Still she said nothing. Cody picked up a piece of toast and threw it at Lou's plate. "Eat," he said once again. He was so fucked off that Lou was acting this way.

Lou's trembling hand reached out and picked up the piece of toast. She sat there and nibbled away at it like a mouse.

Cody was angry. He was working hard trying to make this life work for he and Lou and she had given up on day one. The first couple of nights were hard on him, but he soon begun to realise that he had a warm bed, good food and friends around him.

No longer did he have to sleep with one eye open. No longer did he have to stress about Lou not getting enough food or warmth, he could just be himself, and that was freeing. Why couldn't Lou move on? Why was she making this transition harder than what it has to be?

No more words were spoken at the table, and when the boys all got up and started clearing the table, Lou threw the other half of her toast on her plate and ran back up the stairs.

She grabbed her work clothes, which were the clothes she arrived in, and headed for the bathroom.

Closing the door behind her she undressed herself and stood in front of the long mirror that hung beside the bathtub.

Lou cried as she looked at the image staring back at her. She looked like a boy, a skinny one at that.

Turning to stand side on she could see her hip bones protruding, and her breasts were barely there. She was ugly, inside and out.

Lou grazed her hands over her ribs, she was too skinny. Lou could see that with her own eyes, but she just couldn't face food.

Lou looked up to see her sad eyes staring back at her. They scared her, because she didn't know the person behind them. She didn't like the person behind them.

Cody was right, she was being a brat, hell even that was putting it mildly. But she was not starving herself. She just couldn't bring herself to eat.

Lou ran her hand over her limp lifeless hair before reaching out to turn the shower on. As she did so the sound of the bathroom door opening had Lou and Rachel both gasping.

Rachel took the site of the tiny girl. She had to put her hand over her mouth to stifle the cry that threatened to sound out.

"Get out!" Lou demanded through clenched teeth.

"S-orr-y Lou," was all Rachel could say. She back out through the door closing it behind her.

Lou was ashamed that Rachel had seen her that way. It was bad enough that Cody had seen Lou at her worst, but to have a stranger see her was mortifying.

Swallowing her shame, Lou quickly had a shower, before getting dressed for the day. The boys had already started and Lou didn't want to give Cody any other reason to go off on her.

Quickly throwing her hair into a pony tail Lou ran down the stairs and straight to the door. She didn't want to see Rachel but as Lou's luck would have it she did.

"Lou please can I have a word," Rachel asked as Lou headed for the front door.

"Can't, got work to do." Lou told Rachel avoiding eye contact as she continued out the door.

Lou placed her anger and her embarrassment into moving the hay bales into the barn. Lou couldn't believe Rachel would just barge into the bathroom like that. How dare she? Lou seethed.

She stormed over to where the hay had been dropped off and started to work. Each bale was heavy and Lou knew her arms would be protesting tomorrow, but in some sick way Lou welcomed the pain.

Sweat dripped from her brow as she had moved over half the bales. Her hands were rattled in various blisters, but she did not stop, she would prove to everyone that she could do her share of work no matter how much she ate.

Lou laced her fingers under the twine of another bale and headed for the barn when she saw that a boy about her age was standing in front of it. Trying to act as if she didn't give a damn Lou continued towards the barns doors.

"Whoa, who are you?" The boy asked suddenly standing in Lou's way.

"None of your fucking business," Lou growled as she pushed past the boy with the hay bale still in her hands.

"Since we're neighbours I think it is my business." The boy said as he cut in front of Lou again. "The names Frank," he said as he tipped his hat towards Lou.

"Well Frank, do you mind, you're in my way." Lou told him as she once again tried pushing past. The hay bale weighed a tonne in her tiny arms. All she wanted to do is get it in the barn.

"Actually I do mind. I'm trying to be nice and you're being a bitch." Frank told her as he stayed in her way. "All I want to know is your name."

"And all I want you to do is piss off. We can't all get what we want now, can we."

Frank's eyes narrowed at the girl in front of him. Never has he met such an infuriating woman. The girls in town usually swooned when they saw him, so why wasn't this one?

He reached out and took hold of the hay bale and tried yanking it out of Lou's hand, "Let me help you," Frank suggested. He hoped that once the hay bale was out of her arms then she wouldn't have an excuse to not talk to him.

"I got it thanks," she told Frank.

"You don't look like you got the muscle power to be holding that thing, let me take it for you." He tried pulling it back again, but Lou had a good hold on the twine that held the bale together.

"I said I got it," she snapped shoving her and the bale forward.

Now pissed off Frank ripped the bale out of Lou's hands. What he didn't know is Lou's fingers were under the twine. When he ripped it from her, the twine cut through the underside of her fingers causing her to scream out.

Frank looked to her to see what the problem was, when he saw the blood dripping from between her fingers. He threw the bale to the ground and went to check Lou's hand.

The boys had just finished bringing the mob of horses down from the hill behind the barn when they heard Lou scream out.

Before most of them even registered what it was they heard, Cody was off like lightning. He felt shitty that he was so rough on her this morning. He would not forgive himself if anything ever happened to her.

Teaspoon just pulled up as the commotion happened. He could see the neighbours boy Frank reaching out towards a screaming Lou. From what he could see Lou was cradling her hands.

"Oh lordy, what now?" Teaspoon asked himself as he exited the truck. "Lou, you alright honey?"

Lou looked towards the direction Teaspoon's voice had come from. "Tell him to stay back Teaspoon. He won't listen to me." Lou cried. Teaspoon could clearly see the two, and could see blood dripping from Lou's hand.

"Frank, stand back son." Teaspoon warned. He had no idea what had happened but he could see the frightened look in Lou's eyes.

"She's crazy Teaspoon." Frank told him as he threw his hands up in the air. "It was an accident I didn't know her fingers..."

"I told you I had it." Lou cried out in Frank's direction, the same time a worried looking Cody came around the corner.

Teaspoon sighed knowing that this was not ending well.

Cody looked to the boy, then to Teaspoon and then to Lou. Looking back at the new comer, he quickly did a double take as he saw the blood coming from Lou's hand.

Cody's eye darkened as he advanced on Lou. "What happened?" he asked giving a warning look to Frank.

Lou surprised Teaspoon, Cody and herself when she backed away from Cody.

Cody stopped dead in his tracks.

"Nothing happened, it was just an accident." Frank said.

Lou looked Cody in the eye. "He's right it was just an accident." Then she spun on her heel and ran for the house wrapping her hands in the bottom of her shirt, she did not want to get blood on Rachel's carpet.

Cody just stood there not having a clue to what just happened there. He knew that Lou was upset about what had happened this morning but he didn't realise he had hurt her.

"See I told you." Frank sung. Cody rounded him so quick even Teaspoon didn't have time to intervene. Cody wound Frank's shirt in his fists as he got closer to his face.

"I don't care what she says, she's bleeding and you're standing there telling me nothing happened." Cody seethed in Frank's.

Frank held his hands up in surrender. "I swear man I never touched her."

Teaspoon and Jimmy came to either side of Cody, ready in case they had to pull the two a part.

"Frank, do you mind telling us what did happen?"

"She was carrying a bale into the barn. I offered to help, she would have it. She dropped the bale and the twine cut her hand. End of story."

"Cody that was what I had asked her to do. I needed the hay that was bought in yesterday, in the barn." Jimmy told Cody believing Frank's story.

Lou ran inside and straight up the stairs into the bathroom, ignoring Rachel's calls.

"Lou?" Rachel questioned as she watched the young girl run up the stairs. Rachel looked out the window to see Cody was making his way up to the house.

Lou stood with her hands over the basin. She watched as blood dripped from her wounds and down the drain. She could see fibres from the twine inside the small cuts, but it did not bother her.

Lou was amazed at the release the small cuts made, she didn't feel wound up tight nor did the problems she'd been having bother her at the moment. Her problems dripped down the sink along with her blood.

She felt nothing.


	6. Chapter 6

**I do not own the Young Riders.**

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><p>The house was filled with tension as more days past. Lou had come out of her shell quite a bit in Rachel's eyes. She helped Rachel with cooking and light house work while her hands heeled.<p>

Lou was even going out of her way to make conversation with Rachel. It seemed that the young girl was lighter in a way.

Lou was also eating full meals, and although they were a smaller portion everybody could see that she was trying hard.

It was the once strong friendship between Lou and Cody that caused the tension now.

The two friends barely said boo to each other. And their days seemed to be planned around avoiding one another.

Teaspoon was finding this hard as he had seen how close the two of them were in the city he just couldn't believe the distance between them now.

He hoped by taking them into town the pair would get a chance to talk without everyone else there listening and watching every move.

Cody was going for his licence and Jimmy had given Lou some money to go and buy some clothing.

Jimmy had heard Rachel speaking to Teaspoon about how Lou couldn't go on for much longer with only two sets of clothes.

Jimmy did not feel that it was Rachel or Teaspoon's responsibility to pay for Lou's clothing, so he pulled Lou aside and told her to go and buy what she needed.

Lou was embarrassed. She never had a problem begging or taking things from people while she and Cody lived on the streets, but Jimmy knew her.

She respected him, and she was embarrassed that he knew she couldn't even afford to buy herself some clothing.

"Thank you," she told him quietly, with her head hung low. She was too scared to look him in the eye.

"Lou your hands will heel and you will earn your own way soon enough." Jimmy said looking down at Lou. He could tell that she hated taking the money, but he was glad she didn't put up a fight.

"You ready Lou?" Teaspoon asked as he opened the truck door.

Jimmy gave Lou's shoulder a reassuring squeeze, "Go on, don't keep him waiting." Lou quickly wrapped her arms around Jimmy, squeaking out another thank you before running for the truck.

Teaspoon's plan didn't go as well as he had hoped. Cody and Lou kept their eyes to their side of the windows, and didn't utter a word.

Teaspoon was going to have a word with them once Cody was finished his driving exam. He didn't want to stress the boy out anymore than what he already was.

* * *

><p>Walking from the store Lou was pleased with her purchases. In fact she couldn't wait to wear the new jeans and top, she asked the shop assistant if she could wear them now.<p>

Of course the women had no problem with it. Lou was checking herself out in a reflection of a window, when she was startled by a familiar voice.

"Why hello again." Frank's voice said from behind Lou.

Lou stepped back from the boy and gave him an indifferent look. "Still as snotty as the other day I see." Frank teased knowing he was going to get a bite out of her.

"See you're still a dick." Lou couldn't believe she said that.

She stared at Frank as he stared at her, after a minute they both cracked up laughing.

"What brings you to town?"

"Clothes." Lou told him as she held up the bags in her arms. "And Cody is sitting his licence."

Frank was looking Lou up and down. "Do you want to go do something?"

"Like what?"

"I don't know, let me show you around."

Lou was feeling a little self conscious as Frank kept staring at her like she was something to eat. The word 'No' was on the tip of her tongue, but for some reason her voice said 'Yes'.

"Good girl. How bout you and I go find Cody and let him know of the change of plans?"

"Actually I'm here with Teaspoon as well."

"Even better," Frank smiled as he let Lou lead the way.

They soon found Teaspoon waiting in his truck reading a book.

"Teaspoon is it ok if I get a ride back with Frank?"

Teaspoon looked to Lou and to Frank, he honestly didn't know if it was a good idea or not. But the fact of the matter was Lou was old enough to do as she pleased, she didn't even have to ask for his permission.

"Sure Lou. Cody's still taking the test, we maybe a while."

"Ok well I guess I will see you back at the ranch."

Teaspoon nodded as he looked up at Frank. "Don't wait up Teaspoon, thought I may show her the sights before I take her back."

Teaspoon had never had a problem with Frank nor did he have a reason not to believe him, but Teaspoon did not take too kindly by the cocky attitude the boy was radiating.

Frank led Lou to his Ute. She threw her bags of clothes to the floor as she settled into the passenger seat.

"So,"

"So,"

"So," Frank laughed causing Lou to smile as well.

"Where are you taking me?" Lou asked.

Frank stretched into the back seat and pulled a bottle of whiskey from his bag. "How bout you and I get to know each other?" He said as he passed her the bottle and started the vehicle.

* * *

><p>Cody came out of the exam with a huge smile plastered on his face.<p>

"Good news son?" Teaspoon asked.

"Yes, very good news."

"Well done Cody." Cody had never felt this much pride before. He had achieved and completed something that he wanted to do, and it felt good.

"Where's Lou?" He asked wanting to share his good news with her. Their stupid bickering seemed to be pointless, and he wanted to make amends.

Teaspoon cleared his throat, not happy that he was the bearer of what he was sure was bad news.

"She met up with Frank. He's going to bring her home later." Just as predicted Cody's smile was wiped clean off of his face.

"You just let her go?" Cody asked teaspoon.

"Cody I had no choice, she already had the day off and she is old enough to make her own decisions."

"That maybe so, but she wouldn't know the first thing about making a right decision."

* * *

><p>"How are your hands?" Frank asked Lou. They were both lying on top of the hood of his car, passing the bottle between them, while staring at the vast darkening sky.<p>

"Surprisingly well." Lou laughed as she looked at the bandages that wrapped around her hands. She actually felt as if she should thank him. Since that day Lou had been feeling good.

"I did feel like an ass," Frank laughed.

"I bet you did," Lou said doubtful.

"I did, for all of two minutes." They both laughed out loud as Lou took another sip of the whiskey.

"So what's your deal anyway?"

"My deal?" Lou laughed.

"Yeah, I mean what is up with you and that Cody?"

"We're friends." Lou said unsurely.

"You sure about that?"

"We're having issues but we have been through too much shit to let it all go now."

Frank turned his head too look at Lou. "You got a guy?"

"No and I don't want one either." Lou quickly responded snatching the bottle from Frank.

"Do you want to fool around?"

* * *

><p>"Where the hell is she?" Cody stressed as he looked out the bunkhouse window hoping to see Frank's headlights coming up the drive.<p>

"Cody you know where she is so stop stressing." Jimmy told him.

"If you knew her you would know that this is a big deal."

"What do you mean if we know her? I thought we did."

"You only know a small part Jimmy, a very small part." Cody continued watching the driveway while the other boys sat wanting more answers.

"Do you think it's time you told us everything?" Cody let the curtain drop and turned towards the boys.

"If it involves Lou she should be here." Ike stressed.

"Thing is Ike she would never tell you. I don't even know the full story."

"You keep saying how bad the place was she was living at when you found her. What did you mean by that?" Questioned Buck.

"She was living with a drug dealer. My boss..." Cody trailed off letting that bit of info register in their minds.

"Cody?" Jimmy scolded.

"Tommy found us work selling drugs. And before you say anything Jimmy I did what I had to, to make money and that's it. I never used."

That did not calm Jimmy's mind at all. How the hell could Cody be so stupid?

"Tommy and I went to the bosses' house, a man by the name of Wicks. We had been there plenty of times but I had never seen Lou. I was sitting on the sofa when I could hear someone beating the shit out of someone else. I just happened to look, and I thank the lord every fucking day that I did because there was Wicks beating the shit out of Lou."

"And he was her guardian?" Buck questioned in disgust.

Cody laughed darkly, "Yeah, some fucken' guardian ah?"

"How long?" Jimmy asked, but he soon saw that Cody didn't know what he meant, "How long was she with him?" he rectified.

"She left the home a day after you Cody." Ike signed.

"She was there for about eight months."

Cody stared back out the window. Should he tell the boys all he knew? He would want to know if he was them.

Cody actually wondered if that was why they hadn't gelled back into the close relationships they had back in the home. There were secrets between them. They didn't know each other anymore.

"He was about to rape her." Cody said all of a sudden, making the other boys sit up in a hurry.

"But you succeeded in stopping him, right Cody?" Kid asked with concern.

"That time yes."

"He found you and did it then?" Kid asked trying to understand.

Cody shook his head no, while he turned to face four sets of worried and confused eyes.

"Look I don't know for sure if she was raped. All I know was she was in his care for months before I showed up. She is scared of strange men, and there was this incident..." Cody hated thinking back to that day. He will never get that broken girl out of his mind.

"You have no idea what it was like on the streets with a young girl to look after. I feared for her daily. I did things that I aint proud of, just so we could survive." Cody was struggling with his memories. He didn't know where to start.

"I was meant to be the man, the provider, the protector, the strong one but I failed her on every account. Some days we ate, and most days we didn't. I could practically see the weight fall from her body, and it made me mad. I was mad at everyone, and everything, but mostly I was mad at myself.

I fucked up.

I took Lou to a men's gym. It didn't seem very busy, so I thought that we were going to be able to shower and get out before anyone saw us."

"But you weren't." Buck guessed out loud.

Cody shook his head no. "Two men came in when Lou and I were both naked and in the middle of showering."

"You two showered together?" Kid asked in a disgusted tone. Cody would have snapped, but he knew it wouldn't get him anywhere.

"Kid I didn't look at her like that. It was safer that way." Cody explained. "The men started threatening silly things, I had Lou behind me, but one of them managed to get around my back and pull her away from me." Cody's voice begun to tremble as the feelings of hopelessness that engulfed him that day came back with a vengeance.

"She curled herself into a small ball. She was crying...and she..." Cody was now sobbing as he continued, "She kept repeating...the same...words over...and over... 'Not again...not again...'" Cody cried out in pain as he said the words.

His throat felt like it was about to close over. He tried to even his breath, taking deep breaths in and blowing them out. The boys had never seen Cody look so distressed.

"I haven't asked her, but I know that she has been through hell and back." Cody finally admitted out loud.

Cody's friends could see how much guilt he was harbouring. Hell they were battling their own, but he had save her, could he not see that?

"Cody it aint your fault, you couldn't protect her if you weren't there, hell none of us could."

"It still doesn't make it right."

Jimmy sat back on his bed and started biting at his nails. He didn't have the words to reassure Cody, and it frustrated him.

Ike settled onto his bed and turned to look at the wall. Tears fell from his eyes as he went over what Cody had just shared. Ike loved Lou.

She was his sister in every way it mattered to Ike. She stood up for him back at the home, and she told him everything.

At first he thought she told him the things she did because she knew Ike couldn't talk about them. But he soon came to realise that Lou shared things with him because she trusted him and loved him too.

To hear that she had been hurt in the most brutal ways, hurt him deep. She had been hurt before. Not in the way Wicks may have treated her, but she had been beat, and made to do things that a child should not.

He continued to weep silently as he listened to the other boys get ready to turn in. He hoped that Lou would arrive home soon so Cody could have a peaceful sleep.

"Cody turn in. We have a big day tomorrow." Kid told him, but he had a feeling that he wasn't leaving his post by the window.

Another hour went by, and Cody could finally see the glow of headlights making their way up the driveway.

Cody quickly rushed back to the window and opened the curtain. He could hear Lou laughing, and that should have made him happy. But it didn't.

He hated that it was Frank causing that reaction from her. He watched as she seemed to stumble and zig zag towards the front door.

"Is she drunk?" Cody wondered out loud.

Cody narrowed his eyes as she gave Frank a wave and another smile before she practically fell through the door.

Cody was about to go out and have a word with her, but Ike leapt from his bed and grabbed a hold of Cody's arm.

Cody swung round and looked to Ike, "Don't do it. Not tonight." He signed, begging Cody to just leave it alone.

Cody could see the pleading look in Ike's eyes. He knew his friend was right, now was not the time.

Knowing Lou was home safe would be enough for now, "Ok Ike." Cody said as he headed for his bed.

Ike was thankful Cody didn't go out there. He was sick of the fighting and the tension, it wasn't helping anyone. He hoped that after a night's sleep, Cody's mood would have died down.


	7. Chapter 7

**I do not own the Young Riders**

* * *

><p>Lou woke up with a pounding head ache and the driest of mouths. She bought her arm up to cover her eyes from the intruding sun.<p>

"What was I thinking?" Lou asked herself as she rolled over to try and avoid the light of the day altogether.

A light rap at the door had Lou groaning.

"What is it?" she snapped.

"Breakfast is almost over Lou, would you like to come down and join us?" Rachel asked sweetly.

"Thanks but I think I'll pass Rachel." Lou called out as loud as what her head would allow her to. The thought of food was not a pleasant one. "But I will be down soon."

Rachel was disappointed that Lou wouldn't be eating this morning. She had been doing so well with eating the past few days.

Lou gathered her clothes as she headed for the shower.

Stripping off Lou placed a hand under the spray to cheek the water before she looked into the mirror, grabbing her tooth brush.

She looked at her naked form as she brushed her teeth. Lou didn't know if she should laugh or cry when she saw where Frank's hands had been on her body. He was rough with her, but she had wanted it that way.

Lou continued to brush her teeth in a trance as her eyes went from the hand shaped bruises on her hips, to the teeth marks around her nipples, and the marks around her wrists.

Lou kept brushing as her mind went to how she received every mark on her disgusting body. The way she moaned as Frank's teeth nipped at her breasts, egging him on to bite a little harder, hold on a bit tighter.

"You disgust me." She sneered into the mirror, looking at her reflection.

She angrily slammed her toothbrush down on the porcelain sink and turned to the shower.

She held her head under the spray washing away last night's filth. Why had she allowed Frank to touch her like that?

But she did.

And she liked it.

No she did not take it as far as he wanted to, but it was far enough for her.

Once clean, Lou took her time picking out some of her new clothes and doing her hair. But as she looked into the mirror all Lou saw was ugly.

She pulled her hair back out and styled it another way, took off the white shirt she had put on and swapped it for the blue one. This time when Lou looked into the mirror, she smiled, but it did not last.

"Lou honey," Rachel called out.

Sighing to herself Lou turned away from the mirror and headed down stairs.

Just before she reached the bottom step, Lou ran her hands down her body, and patted her hair. She didn't feel quite right, but she couldn't put her finger on what was bothering her the most about her appearance.

With a deep breath in Lou plastered a smile on her face and stepped out to the living room.

"Morning Rachel,"

"Good morning...oh Lou did you get those clothes yesterday?" Lou nodded her head yes. "They look good sweetheart. Do they feel good?"

"They do. I mean they fit me which is a start." Lou laughed.

"Do you want me to throw your old ones out?"

"No." Lou responded quickly, "Sorry it's just that the shirts I had were Will's."

"You miss him."

"I do." Lou thought of Will's face, he had a big heart and he was the only adult that Lou trusted.

Rachel was clearing the dining table so Lou thought she would make a start on the laundry. But Cody's voice stopped her.

"Lou, can I have a word?" Cody asked, but Lou knew that he wasn't actually asking.

Lou looked around to Rachel before she excused herself and followed Cody out the door.

She kept behind him as he strutted towards the barn. He was angry that much was clear. Hell he was always angry at Lou these days.

"Who's this Frank?" He asked with distaste as he rounded on Lou.

Lou tilted her head and raised her eyebrows, "You know who he is Cody." She replied in that, 'don't play games with me' tone.

"I don't know who he is to you." He quickly snapped back.

They stared each other down for a few minutes before Lou replied.

"He's a friend." Lou lied, as she wrapped her arms around her middle.

After what she and Frank did last night, Lou felt like she couldn't call him a friend.

"Some friend if he brings you home drunk." Cody spat as he looked Lou up and down.

Cody could tell she had changed, but he thought her change was not as good as what the others thought.

Yes she was eating more, and she seemed somewhat pleasant, most of the time, but Cody could see it was all an act.

She was fooling them all, but she wouldn't fool him.

"I swear I don't know who you are any more." Lou cried, feeling confused and hurt at Cody's harshness.

"Back at you sweetheart."

Lou turned and headed back to the house, she wasn't going to stand there and allow Cody to speak to her in that way.

"Don't walk away while I'm trying to talk to you." Cody pulled on Lou's already tender wrist, "Talk to me, tell me what is wrong with you."

"Wrong with me?" Lou laughed, "There isn't anything wrong with me. Why would you say that?"

"You've changed Lou, surely you can see that."

"We all change Cody." Lou looked around the barn, "Like living here. I thought coming back to the boys, having you and living here would be great, but I hate it."

"I thought you had gotten over that. I mean are you still sore that you and I don't share a room anymore?"

"No I'm angry that you and I aren't anything anymore." Lou whimpered. "You and I were so close, you looked after me, protected me...I love you." Lou sobbed, "But being here has changed it all. You have moved on, you don't need me as much as I need you."

"That's true Lou," Cody agreed, "I don't need you as much anymore, and I don't say that to hurt you. But you stand there and you say to me how hard it is on _**you**_, how upset _**you**_ are, what about me?" Cody asked.

"Do you even know or care that since the first night here I have slept every night. I don't have to sleep with one eye open. I don't lay awake at night stressing about how we're going to eat or clean the next day. Or wonder where the hell we're going to sleep the following night. I have none of those worries anymore and it is freeing." Cody could see that as soon as he got the words out Lou had taken it all the wrong way.

"Sorry I was such a burden. You should have left me with Wicks." And with that said Lou left Cody in the barn.

She ran up to the house and got into the laundry. Lou knew that was a shit thing to throw in Cody's face, because he would have never left her with Wicks.

Cody had done nothing but look after her, and he was right, she didn't once think how it all affected him.

After the laundry Lou got stuck into the dusting then she got the vacuuming done.

By the time Rachel came in to start on lunch, the house was in order and it looked good.

Lou had just sat down on the sofa when Rachel passed her a fresh glass of lemonade.

Grabbing her own glass Rachel took a seat next to Lou.

Over the last few days she and Lou were starting to talk, and Rachel loved having the female company.

"Rachel I have been thinking and I am really grateful for you and Teaspoon for putting me up, I just...I want to move closer to town. I want to finish school and I want a job that is mine." Lou quickly rushed out the last sentence, before sighing, "I need to prove to myself that I can make it on my own."

"Are you sure it's to prove to yourself or is it to prove to someone else as well." Rachel asked. She was concerned that this was the last thing Lou needed to do. But it was not up to Rachel to make that decision.

Lou knew Rachel was talking about Cody and Lou also knew that she would be lying to herself if she said that he didn't play a big part in her decision, but there were other reasons too.

"Rachel, last night with Frank I felt normal. I felt like I was a normal girl out with a guy experiencing the life of a normal teenage girl. I want to experience more. I want to experience it all. I'm not in the same place as the boys anymore. They have grown up so much and seem happy at where they are in the world."

"Lou the boys all rebelled in their one way or another when they got here, and it is understandable, but it did no one any good."

"But shouldn't I be able to have the same chance to see for myself?" Lou asked, "Rachel I want to rebel I want to make mistakes I want to live. I don't feel like I can do that here." As much as Rachel was going to hate admitting it, she could see that Lou was right. Lou needed to experience things she never had a chance to growing up.

Though Rachel did not agree that Lou needed to move away to find herself Rachel also knew that no one was stopping her.

"Honey you are telling this to the wrong person. There are five boys out there that love you and want what's best for you. You need to be telling them all of this."

"You don't need to," Cody said from the door way. Lou and Rachel turned with shocked faces, "We heard it all." Cody said as all the boys walked out of the house leaving only Teaspoon, and a crying Lou in Rachel's arms.

After a few minutes, Rachel told Lou to go up to her room and have a rest. She could see that the girl was emotionally tired, and she needed to be away from the boys.

Teaspoon was getting a bit sick of the drama, and wondered if Lou moving wasn't such a bad idea.

"Teaspoon, the last thing that girl needs, is to be living by herself. Trust me it will do more harm than good." Rachel scolded. How dare he think Lou should leave?

"She's old enough to make that decision for herself." Teaspoon argued.

"What about the boys? They will be just as miserable as they were when she wasn't here at the start."

"But that's the thing Rachel, they are all still miserable. Her being here hasn't stopped that."

Rachel and Teaspoon continued to argue, their voices loud enough for Lou to hear.

Lou was being swallowed by guilt. She was causing problems for everyone. Curling herself in a ball she lay atop of the bed and wept.

A few hours later Lou woke up to see that the day was settling in for the night. She wiped her eyes free of its sleep and rolled out of bed.

Her head was pounding, and parts of her body ached, as she headed downstairs.

Lou scanned the house, but she was alone. "Maybe they left me," Lou said to herself. Hell she wouldn't blame them if they did.

Lou deciding she better look outside for anyone, grabbed a jacket from the coat rack and slipped it on.

She pulled the sleeves over her hands and wrapped her arms around her middle as she stepped out into the cool air.

She could see shadows in the bunkhouse, so knew that the boys were still here. Lou walked closer to the barn noticing that Teaspoon's truck had gone. 'Maybe Teaspoon and Rachel had gone out for the evening,' Lou thought.

As she turned to head back into the house, she saw a figure sitting in the long grass overlooking the setting sun and the paddocks.

Lou quietly walked up beside the person and sat down next to him in the grass.

"Hey Ike," Lou sat next to her friend. Well she hoped that she could still call him that. "I'm a shitty friend, aren't I?"

Ike looked down to Lou and shook his head with a genuine smile on his lips. Lou loved that smile.

Lou scooted closer but Ike grabbed her by the arm and pulled her to sit between his legs.

Lou pulled her knees up to her chest and Ike wrapped both of his arms around them and her. They both looked out towards the setting sun.

"I miss this, I missed you." Lou said softly, enjoying the warmth of Ike.

"I never thanked you for being my shoulder to cry on." Ike tightened his hold on Lou and settled his head on her shoulder. "You listened to it all, and still you stayed my friend." A shudder ran through Lou's body as she remembered the things she had shared with Ike in the past.

Ike grabbed one of Lou's hands and turned her palm towards him. Lou watched intently as Ike traced the words 'Talk to me' on her palm. Lou let out a sob as she knew Cody had told them his concerns.

Lou breathed in deeply, "He's told you." She let out her breath, at the same time she felt Ike nodding.

Her mind went back to her last parental figures. She was glad that her so called last mother could not bear children. That woman should never have any children in her care.

Of course she was not the one who came into her room at night, nor was she the one who tore her innocence from her in the most heinous of ways, but she was the smiling force behind the man.

She slept on the other side of the wall, she would have heard the screams of help, the desperate cries for a saviour but she didn't become either one.

She slept peacefully in the other room while her husband found his relief and destroyed the soul of a fifteen year old girl.

"Do you think I'm worthy of love Ike? So many have tried but in the end it was always too hard for them and they ended up hurting me. Maybe I'm just plain unlovable."

Ike grabbed Lou's face forcibly and turned it towards him.

"We love you. We all love you." He signed angrily. How dare she think that?

"I know Ike but it's not the love that I have craved since my parents were killed. Just once I wanted to be taken to a home and have parents that were proud to call me their little girl, to treat me as if I was worth something, that my existence on this planet mattered. But it never happened.

I was the live in baby sitter, house keeper and..." Lou couldn't finish, her tears were coming in thick. Unwanted memories flooded her mind, and she had already shared them with Ike, they both didn't need to relive or learn about them.

Ike was crying just as hard as Lou. He was sad for Lou, but he was also pissed off that he couldn't scream for her to stay. He did not want her leaving again.

"I gotta go," Lou cried as she ripped herself out of Ike's arms and flew towards the house.

Lou felt heavy with despair, and frustrated to hell as she ran into the house and straight up the stairs.

Her body was screaming for a release from all the heart ache she had endured today. The weight of the world felt like it was sitting atop of her shoulders, and she couldn't cope. She didn't want it there.

Lou found the bathroom instead of her bedroom.

Slamming the door shut behind her, Lou stood with her back pressed hard against the cold wood.

Her chest heaved in and out and her breathing was fast and heavy. She felt hopeless, and exposed. No one should know her dark secrets, no one should care.

Lou looked around the small room, her eyes quickly finding the medicine cabinet.

Stumbling over her own feet she fell against the vanity unit, her hip hitting hard against the white porcelain. Her hands fumbling as quick as they could to pull open the small door.

She pushed away bottles, and packages allowing them to fall to the empty sink, but still not finding what she needed.

"God damn it," she cried out in frustration, falling back to sit on top of the toilet seat.

Lou's nails started tearing at the healed sores on her hands, but it wasn't having the same effect as it did when she first cut them.

Tapping her feet on the lino she scanned the bathroom. Her fingers in her mouth as she gnawed at the skin by her finger nails.

She needed to feel something, anything but the weight of her tortured past.

Her eyes soon landed on a small pink plastic razor that sat so innocently in the shower.

Without another moments thought, Lou got to her feet, stripping her clothes from her body and throwing them to a heap on the floor, her eyes never leaving the escape she seeked.

She stepped into the shower not caring if the water was warm enough or not.

Her hand grabbed a hold of the razor and in a matter of seconds she had broken the plastic off around the small blade, allowing the small pink shards to fall to the shower floor.

Lou slid down the wet wall, to sit on the shower floor. The blade rested between her thumb and pointing finger. She looked down at her naked thigh, and without another moments thought, Lou pressed the blade to her skin.

And she cut.

It took a second for her to feel it, but when she did...her eyes rolled back and the blade fell from her finger tips.

Her eyes closed as she felt the weight leave her body.

Slowly she opened them, seeming dreamy. She looked around at her surroundings remembering what she had just done.

Looking down Lou watched her blood mix with the warm water. They weaved together making a red pattern down Lou's leg before disappearing down the drain.

Lou had no idea how long she sat there just watching but when the water started to run cold, Lou seemed to wake up to where she was and what she had been doing.

"Shit,"

Lou turned the water off and reached for a towel. She was mindful to where the blood was going. She didn't want to leave it for anyone to see.

She sat back on the toilet seat with the towel around her and a wad of toilet paper held to the cut on her leg.

Lou was still in a dreamy stat as she applied as much pressure as she could to the cut on her thigh.

A loud knock had Lou jumping from the toilet seat.

"Lou can you come out, we need to talk." Cody's voice asked.

Lou panicked as she grabbed her clothes. "Ah...Yeah...Just give me a minute." Lou called out as she tried to pull her clothes on in a hurry.

Cody's eyebrows furrowed as he heard the panic in Lou's voice. What the hell was she up to? He wondered.

"I'll be down stairs when you're ready." He told her, turning from the bathroom. Something inside him was screaming for him to barge in there, but he shook it off.

Lou and he were already fighting. He didn't want to make it worse by acting out on a hunch.

Rachel and Teaspoon had gone out for the evening. He could tell that when they left they were stressed and not talking with one another. That was what prompted Cody to come over and talk with Lou.

Maybe she was right in moving away and Cody thought that he could not fault her for wanting to make her life better. If Lou thought that being by herself for the time being then he would not judge her decision.

"Cody I'm sorry." Lou said softly coming down the stairs to sit in front of Cody. "Sorry I hurt you."

"You didn't hurt me Lou. You pissed me off is all."

"Sorry," she said once again.

Cody took a deep breath in and out as he looked Lou over, "Lou what's happening to us?"

Lou shook her head, "I don't know Cody. I think that we're just trying to find our place in the world."

"Can't we do that together? I mean it's been me and you against the world for so long..." he didn't get to finish because Lou's silent cries became louder.

"Cody...Cody..." she cried in a pleading for help kind of a way.

"What is it Lou? Talk to me." Cody panicked as he sat forward and leaned closer towards Lou.

"I don't know...I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm saying things that I don't mean to say, doing things that I don't mean to do. I just don't know any more."

"Lou you're scaring me."

"Cody I just...I wanted to have you and the boys back with me for so long and now that I have you...I don't know what else I want out of life." Lou cried.

Cody kneeled down in front of Lou and grabbed her face with his hands. "You will find it Lou. You will find something or someone who will have you wanting everything from life. You just have to be open to everything."

He kissed her forehead before his thumbs wiped at Lou's fallen tears. "Please don't move away." He begged her. He wanted to remind her that he wouldn't be with her. Protect her if the need was there.

"Cody I'm not going to be far away."

"I know, but you're not going to be across the yard either." Cody pointed out.

"True. But I expect you to visit me every chance you get."

"Wild horses wouldn't keep me away."


	8. Chapter 8

**I do not own the Young Riders**

**Warning, dark chapter, strongly recommend the M rating. Mentions cutting and bad language. **

* * *

><p>Rachel and Teaspoon helped Lou a lot these past few weeks. They helped her get signed up at the University and enrolled her to take classes to help her with her GED.<p>

Teaspoon and the boys found Lou a small apartment close to school and to town. She had no desire to go for her licence yet, as she felt like she had too much already on her plate.

The apartment wasn't much, but to Lou it was everything. One bedroom, one bathroom, the living room and kitchen were just one room, perfect in Lou's eyes.

Rachel gave Lou most of the furniture she needed, her favourite being the dining room table.

The thing nearly took up the whole apartment, but every time Lou looked at it she closed her eyes and imagined her and the boys sitting around it. They were laughing, as they talked, their meals long forgotten.

Lou couldn't wait for that dream to become a reality. Though she knew it was still a while away, she had hope that the boys and her would find their way again. After all they were all each other had.

Apart from Frank.

Lou was looking forward to spending sometime by herself and getting to know who she was without outside influences, but Frank had other ideas.

He turned up at the new apartment that first night, and has yet to leave.

.

.

.

Months had past and Lou's life had changed dramatically. She had started studying and attending some classes for her GED. Most of it seemed to come relatively easy for her but science was kicking her butt.

Between studying and classes she had a job at the local supermarket, stacking shelves and cleaning the floors. It was hard work for such little pay, but Lou would find herself arriving early and asking for longer hours.

The boys would help out, in what they would call small ways, but Lou thought of them as huge.

They would bring her vegetables and fruit from Rachel's garden and meat from...well, Lou tried to not think too hard where the meat had come from, she was appreciative of it all. The boys would try and slip her some money but she wouldn't have it on. She wanted to try and make it on her own.

In her spare time, which wasn't a lot, Lou tried to catch up with them as much as she could. She missed Cody something fierce, and had hoped that the time away from one another would help ease some of the tension, but it hadn't.

Jimmy kept telling Lou that although she didn't see it, Cody cared for her a lot. He told her to not to give in. Not that she ever would. She and Cody had been through too much to just give each other up.

Frank was jealous of Lou's time with the boys. He couldn't understand why she needed them, and he couldn't understand why Lou wanted them here in what Frank saw as their home.

Frank had started demanding her spare time. With a heavy heart Lou agreed, feeling like there was no other choice.

His roughness was no longer just for the bedroom as he seemed to want to dominate her in everything she did.

What she wore, what she ate, how she should wear her hair and what she should listen to on their small radio. Lou was no longer her own person and as time went on, she was beginning to see that it wasn't how she wanted to live.

Everything out of Frank's mouth was an insult, that she had no doubt been said to hurt her deeply. Did he not see that she hurt daily? He didn't need to add to her pain.

But she couldn't get rid of him. Deep down she didn't want to get rid of him.

He was her emotional blade, cutting her deep within.

She didn't know if he realised how much his words hurt her, or how they mark her.

Sometimes, and very briefly, Lou will catch how he looked at her. With hate in his eyes, she got the feeling that he knew exactly what he's doing to her.

Before she can question it, or confront him, his eyes morph back into the man she believes loves her.

With Frank around the need to cut doesn't strangle her. When he's in a mood she riles him up, needing his nasty words, or his rough hands.

Maybe she was wrong. This is exactly how she wants to live.

The boys can see something is not quite right, but they don't see how bad it truly is.

.

.

.

Although Lou's job pays her pittance, she has not spent a single dime, apart from rent, groceries and utilities. She has saved what was left out of her pay.

The one thing Rachel did not have spare was a bed. Lou, and Frank, had spent the last few months sleeping on a makeshift bed, just like she had on the streets.

And it was wearing her down.

Today she had enough money to buy a mattress and Base from a local department store. It was nothing flash, no head board, no fancy springs, just a plain mattress and base, and Lou couldn't have been happier.

She walked into the store with her head held high and her eyes straight ahead. Lou was proud of what she was about to do, in fact she could not remember any other time in her life that she had felt that way.

To help celebrate Lou walked to the grocery store and bought all the ingredients for lasagna, Frank's favourite. She wanted to celebrate her first real taste on independence.

After gathering what she needed Lou made her way home. The first thing she did was phone the boys and invited them for dinner. She didn't tell them what it was for, but she did tell them it was a special occasion.

After her phone call Lou got to clearing out the bedroom, the delivery men were dropping the bed off at anytime and she still had dinner to prepare.

An hour later the door to the apartment opened, and Lou smiled knowing it was Frank, and excited that she could share her news with someone at last.

"Hi Frank,"

"Hi darling," he came up behind Lou and placed his arms around her waist. "Have you put on weight?" he asked as he moved his hands back and sat them on her hips.

The way he said it had Lou thinking it was a bad thing. She kept her mouth shut though. He wasn't going to ruin her mood.

"I bought a bed today." Lou sung as she sliced some mushrooms, changing the subject.

"You did?" Frank asked kissing and nipping at her neck.

"Yip," Lou said.

"Shall we christen it?" Frank asked playfully as he slid his hand up Lou's shirt and under her bra.

"Frank I'm cooking dinner...and...ah..." Lou moaned as Frank pulled and twisted her nipples.

"I...the..." Lou lost all train of thought and finally gave up placing the knife on the bench and turning in Franks arms.

Her mouth found his and he picked her up and carried her through to the room, throwing her on the new bed.

Making love with Frank was both scary and exciting. Lou never knew what he was going to do, or how far he would take it.

.

.

.

Both of them lay there exhausted, as their bodies tingled from where the others hands had been.

Lou loved that she could feel Frank's hands on her, even hours after they had been together. Just that thought drove her mad with desire.

"You know Lou you are getting a bit on the plump side," Frank told her again, but this time he said it with distaste as he grabbed at the skin on her hips.

Lou slapped his hand away. She had been eating more because Cody had told her too.

"Shit the boys will be here any minute. I need to get the lasagna in the oven."

"Why are they coming?" Frank asked annoyed. He hated those boys that Lou had the audacity to call family.

"Because, I want to celebrate," Lou explained.

"Am I not enough? And why in the hell does someone celebrate having a bed?" Frank whined as he got up off the bed.

Lou was disappointed by Frank's words. The things he has taken for granted in his life time make him selfish.

Frank leaned over and smacked Lou's ass, hard. "Awl, what was that for."

"For being a stupid bitch," He laughed, "I'm going to shower." Frank told Lou as he flew from the bed.

Lou didn't know why but she had tears in her eyes. Though Frank's slap had stung, it was the way he spoke to her that always hurt the most. And yes she sometimes needed the hurt, but today was special for her, she wanted to be treated special too.

Deciding to not let it get her down, Lou quickly pulled her clothes on and washed her hands and brushed her teeth before racing back to the kitchen. She couldn't lie there stressing about Frank's feelings.

In no time at all a knock on the door had Lou throwing the dish cloth in the sink and running to answer it. She hadn't realised how much she had missed the boys. She felt like she hadn't seen them in weeks, but where in reality it was only a few days ago.

Lou pulled open the door with a huge, proud smile on her face.

"Hi beautiful," Jimmy said as he kissed her cheek and hugged her tightly.

"Lou," Said Buck, but he was pushed out of the way by Cody before he could hug her.

"Lou you're too damn skinny. Are you eating?" Cody asked not even bothering with a hello first.

"Don't," Lou warned.

"Don't what?" Cody asked.

"Don't ruin this for me." Lou warned as she looked behind Cody, choosing to ignore him, and saw Ike.

Ike walked over to Lou and gave her a hug. "Hi Ike," with a kiss to her temple Ike pulled back, while Kid moved to finally greet Lou.

"What the hell is that on your neck?" Kid asked to which everyone turned to look at.

Lou placed her hand up to neck, trying to cover where she could see they were looking. She ran over to the mirror that hung in the small living room. "Bloody Frank," she cursed as she looked at the big hickey on the side of her neck.

"What did I do this time?" he asked coming into the room.

"You think it's ok to mark her?" Cody snapped. He hated the thought of him touching her full stop, but to see evidence of where he has been made Cody's stomach churn.

"Cody let it be." Buck told him, trying to keep the peace.

Lou watched as Cody and Frank's eyes each other. Cody's question running wild in her mind, _"You think it's ok to mark her?"_ Lou closed her eyes praying the boys never found out just how marked she was.

Opening her eyes she quickly told the boys and Frank to have a seat while she bought the dinner to the table.

Frank smiled smugly as he walked over to the table. He loved that the boys knew Lou was his.

The rest of the boys sat down at the table while Lou served up dinner before sitting down and serving herself. She cut herself a smaller portion but it wasn't small enough in Frank's eyes.

"Lou" he warned catching the boys off guard. They didn't know what had just happened as they looked to Lou for some idea, then back to Frank.

But it was Jimmy who kept his eyes on Lou and watched as she cut her piece of lasagna even smaller, and put the other half back in the dish.

Jimmy was about to say something when Frank spoke up again, "Lou you will come sit next to me."

"Who the hell died and made you boss?" Cody snapped; his face red with anger.

Buck seeing that something was going to go down tried to take the heat off of the situation once again.

"So Lou you said this was a celebration, what are we celebrating sweetheart?"

They boys watched as Lou's face lit up in the biggest smile they had ever seen on her young face.

"I bought myself a bed today." She continued to smile. "I mean I actually paid for it with the money I earned and now it is mine." Lou was ecstatic, she had never owned anything.

"Ah ours," Frank corrected.

"No Frank it is mine." Lou said with a frown, shaking her head at him.

"Lou it is in our house and we will both share the bed so it is ours."

"No this is my house I pay the rent, and that is my bed, that I paid for with my own money."

Frank narrowed his eyes at Lou. How dare she speak to him in that way? He slammed his palms down hard on the table, causing his glass to knock over and smash, sending glass all over Ike and making both Lou and Ike jump out of their seats.

Seeing the frightened look on Lou and Ike's faces, Jimmy, Buck, Kid and Cody stood as well.

"You son of a bitch," Jimmy roared but it was Cody who sprung into action and grabbed Frank by the cuff of his collar.

"You dare raise your voice and scare her and Ike like that,"

"Come on it was nothing." Frank laughed in Cody's face.

"Look at them, it wasn't nothing." Ike was holding Lou who had her face buried in his chest, while Ike silently cried with her.

"He needs to learn to man the fuck up. Look at him...what a pussy." Frank continued to laugh, before he slammed his fist in Cody's stomach, causing him to fall back and away from Frank.

"Son of a..." Cody and Kid no longer held back as they started throwing punches back at Frank.

But they were doing more harm than good. Ike and Lou didn't need to witness anymore violence.

Jimmy ushered them into Lou's bedroom and out of the way of the chaos in the living room. Leaving Buck to try and break up Frank, Cody and Kid.

Jimmy sat on the bed with Ike and Lou and listened to Buck trying to calm everyone down.

"Ike don't you dare believe anything Frank said. You're more of a man than he will ever be." Jimmy told Ike.

Jimmy looked on in sadness as Lou curled up in a small ball in Ike's lap. "Lou do you want me to pack some things and you can come out and stay at the ranch until all this settles down?"

"No," Lou shook her head. "Please Jimmy, I will be fine." Lou was more upset that Frank had caused Ike trouble.

Jimmy didn't want her staying here by herself, but if he has learnt anything these past few months, it is to never suggest what Lou should do. She needed to find her own way and make her own mistakes.

"Lou what the fuck do you think you are doing with that dick?" Cody roared as he threw the bedroom door open. "He is no good for you. I have bit my lip for too long, but not anymore."

"What's that suppose to mean?" Lou asked, and wondering when he has had to bite his lip. Cody has never sat back and not told anyone how he truly feels, so why would he start now?

"It means that if you don't finally throw him to the curb I ain't coming round here no more."

Lou looked at Cody in shock, as did the other boys. The boys knew Cody was trying to get her to see Frank for who he truly was, but he wasn't exactly going about it the right way.

Lou stood up and stood in front of Cody.

"You know what...I can't win." Lou cried out throwing her hands up in frustration. "I'm too fat, I'm too skinny. I should be doing this or I should be doing that, give me a god damn break." She screamed in his face.

Cody stood there just staring at her. He knew in his heart that he was always on her case, and he knew that it affected her more than anyone thought, but his head wasn't in the same place as his heart.

So instead of apologising or sitting down to talk about things, he walked away. He simply turned his back on her and walked out the door, leaving Lou staring after him.

After what felt like an eternity Jimmy finally decided to ask her if she was alright,

"Lou..."

"Just go Jimmy. I can't talk to anyone at the moment, please all of you, just go." Lou begged still looking down at her hands.

Jimmy looked to Kid, Buck and Ike who looked as conflicted as he felt. He frowned down at Lou before he had to do what he thought was right.

This was her house, she had asked them to leave, but she sure as hell didn't say that he couldn't come back tomorrow.

"Alright Lou, we'll leave you be." Jimmy said as he motioned with his head for the other boys to follow him out. "You know we are only a phone call away if you need us."

Lou looked up from her hands in her lap and offered Jimmy a sad smile, "I know, and thank you." And she did know. But just once in her life she wished she didn't need them so much.

She wanted to feel like she could actually do something right for once. That something in her life was going great, and that is why her bed was a big deal for her.

Lou ran her hand over the covers of her bed, a tear slipping from her eye, her excitement and pride gone.

The sound of the boy's truck roared to life outside, and the sound of it leaving had Lou finally releasing a wail. Her hand flew up to her mouth as sobs raked through her.

This was not what she had planned. This was not her night of celebration.

Letting her hand fall from her mouth, Lou got up from the bed and walked out to the living room. Dishes with uneaten food lay upon the table, and dishes in the kitchen sink were piled up high.

She sighed out loud and rubbed her hands over her face. She didn't want to face that, she wasn't in the mood.

Turning off the lights she solemnly made her way back to her bedroom. She stripped her pants off and fell back on her bed.

The bed,

Her bed,

Their bed!

Lou grabbed her throat, unable to swallow around her emotions that were blocking it.

Even her bed was tainted.

She wanted so bad to throw Frank out. How dare he do this to her? How dare he take something from her, that wasn't his to give?

She worked hard for the bed.

It was hers.

She knew Frank could afford several beds, so why hers?

Lou kicked her legs and she screamed. Her hands covered her eyes as she wept.

Her emotions flicking from one to another, never settling on one, she knew she was being stupid as she cried and agonized about her bed.

This wasn't about the bed.

It was about her.

Frank claimed the house, claimed the bed and claimed her. He owned all she had and all she was, nothing in this world was hers, not even herself.

Lou flew from the bed, stumbling as fast as she could to her set of drawers. She grabbed her blade that she hid in a sock at the back of her middle draw.

Like a robot Lou walked to the bathroom and turned the shower on.

She stripped herself naked and slid under the hot spray of the water. She allowed it to run over her body, turning her creamy white skin into an angry red.

She kept toying with the blade in her hands. She wanted to cut, she wanted to so bad, but she wanted to have some control over something as well.

She didn't want another thing to own her. She wanted to start getting her life _back. _

"_Have you put on weight?"_

"_Lou you're too damn skinny. Are you eating?"_

"_For being a stupid bitch,"_

"_It means that if you don't finally throw him to the curb I ain't coming round here no more."_

"SHUT UP!" she screamed as her hands gripped at her hair.

Lou slid down the shower wall, like she has done so many times before. She could hear their voices inside of her head. She didn't know how to make them stop.

Holding the blade to the skin on her thigh Lou pressed it down hard, but the sound of the door opening had Lou look up in shock to a surprised Frank.

Lou started crying out loud as her hand trembled over her skin. She sought the release but Frank was standing right there and it was putting her off.

Frank could see the desperation on Lou's face as her hand trembled. He stripped himself off and stepped into the shower, never taking his eyes off of her.

He knelt down in front of Lou and placed his hand over top of hers, steadying her hand.

Their eyes locked in on one another as Frank pushed down on Lou's hand causing the blade to break Lou's skin.

A soft whimper escaped Lou's lips as they both cut into the soft skin of her delicate thigh.

Frank knew from that moment on he owned her completely. He watched in rapt fascination as Lou's eyes became dazed and her face softened.

She curled her legs up and Frank got lost in the sight of her blood flowing. Frank's mouth begun to water and his cock began to harden, never had he felt more powerful than what he did in this moment.

He stood up and pulling Lou to her feet. He pushed her up against the shower wall, and begun to touch her.

Lou wouldn't look at him, so he grabbed her face with his hand and tilted her head back. "My broken doll," he smiled as he stared into her distant eyes.

* * *

><p><strong>A big thank you to Jenna for looking over this for me xx<strong>


	9. Chapter 9

**I do not own the Young Riders.**

**So sorry for taking so long to get this out. Thanks for your reviews and those who added me to their alerts. **

* * *

><p>"Stop the truck!" Cody yelled out of nowhere. He couldn't leave, not like that.<p>

Kid slammed on the brakes at Cody's request. "Turn back," Cody demanded, to which the boys sighed with relief. None of them felt right leaving Lou at the house by herself with the tension thick between them.  
>Cody couldn't leave without apologising to Lou. He had no right to make such a request from her. Of course she wouldn't choose Frank over him, why would she?<br>Kid drove back to the small apartment somewhat faster than he did when he was driving away from it. Just like the other boys, Kid knew it was wrong leaving Lou, but for some reason they didn't voice it to Cody.

It seemed that there was an unspoken rule that they had no say in anything that concerned Lou. For some reason they waited for Cody's instructions, it had been like that ever since they were all reunited.

Cody didn't even wait for the truck's ignition to be turned off, he flew from the back seat of the truck and out the door, running as fast as he could up to Lou's door and knocked loudly.  
>Yes it was late, but Cody knew that there was no way Lou would be asleep. Really they had not long left and he knew that she wouldn't be able to sleep with the dishes still lying around, and yet another reason why they shouldn't have left.<p>

Cody saw all the hard work Lou had put into dinner, and it went un-eaten and the dishes still on the table. They should have helped her clean up. They should have sat down and eaten the meal Lou had prepared. All these things they should have done, but didn't.

"Jesus I'm a fool." Cody sighed out loud. Once again he had let his anger rule the outcome of the situation.  
>Cody took a step back as heard the locks being freed.<br>He chanced a look back to the others to see they were all waiting by the truck, but making no movement towards the house, he was grateful to them for seeing he and Lou had to talk.  
>As the door opened Cody turned back expecting to see Lou standing there but what he got was not expected.<br>"Unfucking believable," Cody roared in anger. "Of course she fucking picks you," His previous thoughts forgotten.  
>Frank stood in the doorway with a shit eating grin, wearing only a towel around his waist and dripping wet. "Can I help you?" Frank asked smugly. "We're kinda in the middle of something." he sung suggestively.<br>Cody was furious, absolutely wild with rage. "Yeah tell Lou her choice is loud and clear." Cody managed to get out through clenched teeth before turning his back on Frank and heading for the truck. He hadn't got but two steps when he heard Frank slam the door shut and the sound of the locks fastening caught his ears.  
>"The stupid bitch!" Cody yelled in frustration. He was shaking his head, not believing that she had chosen Frank. Why would she do that?<br>The other boys entered the truck feeling just as rejected as Cody, and somewhat pissed as he was too. They all witnessed what an asshole Frank was, they didn't want to believe Lou was that weak to stay and accept the way Frank spoke to her.

.

.

.

.  
>Weeks had passed and nothing much had changed. Lou never once rung the boy's, and the boys did not ring her.<br>Ike had tried on many occasions to convince Buck to ring on his behalf, but Buck wouldn't do it. He didn't know where Lou's head was at and didn't want Ike being hurt the same way Cody had. Buck also believed that Lou had to figure this out on her own. If she was to come back to any of them she had to do it off her own back, not by outside influence.  
>Rachel and Teaspoon were at a loss as to what to do. Will had rung them and had told them that Frank wouldn't even allow him to talk to Lou. Will had told Teaspoon that he was days away from getting in his car and driving to Wyoming to find out what the hell was going on.<br>Teaspoon was trying to hold him off for as long as possible, hoping that one of the boys was going to come to their senses. But as more days past he had witnessed more harsh words being muttered by the boys. They were becoming divided and he was starting to think that not one of them was walking away from this intact.  
>Even Teaspoon himself was starting to think that Lou was too troubled to help. She had done nothing but cause problems since she arrived.<br>So many times he thought about getting in the truck and dragging the girl back to the ranch himself. But he was also aware that would cause more problems.  
>The last straw was when Teaspoon caught Ike sobbing in the stables. Teaspoon had witnessed the boy come out of his shell all those months ago, and now he could see Ike was slowly slipping back into it. Teaspoon couldn't, or rather wouldn't allow that.<br>He took it upon himself to find out as much as he could about Frank and Lou. He had to believe like the majority of the boys did, that Frank was holding something over her, that she would not willingly choose him over the boys.

Teaspoon drove over to Frank's Mothers and asked her about the couple. He was surprised to hear that Frank's mother had no idea about any girl in Frank's life.  
>Frank had not told her about living with Lou or that there was even a relationship to even talk about. She thought Frank was living with some friends so he could be closer to town and experiencing life as a young man without having his Mother hanging over his shoulder. The fact that Frank would lie to his own Mother, did not sit right with Teaspoon.<br>Teaspoon decided that Lou was in a situation that made him feel uncomfortable about. He didn't like the thought of the young girl living so far away by herself with a boy that he was beginning to think was trouble.  
>His boys were good boys, he had to believe in them and their instincts, if they say that Frank is no good, then he had to believe that.<br>The following day he pulled Jimmy aside and told him to go and check on the girl. He told Jimmy that he was going to tell the boys that he'd sent Jimmy into town for supplies. He also told Jimmy if Frank was there, then he was to come straight back home. Teaspoon couldn't have Jimmy get into a fight with Frank.

.

.

.

"Jimmy what are you doing here?" Lou asked as she looked behind his shoulder to see if he had come alone.  
>"I came alone Lou." Jimmy reassured her, when he caught on to what she was doing. Lou was grateful, or was she? She missed the boys and especially Cody.<br>"Teaspoon had some things that needed picking up in town, so I thought I would call past and check in on ya."  
>Lou stepped aside "Come in," she said allowing Jimmy to walk inside. Even though she knew Frank would hate it.<br>Jimmy wandered into the small apartment and stood next to the armchair. He looked around taking in how spotless the place was, well except for the papers scattered over the table. "I see you're studying?"  
>He nodded to the school work spread out on the table.<p>

"Yeah, it's getting pretty hectic." Lou smiled as she went over and started straightening some things up.  
>"You don't need to do that," Jimmy told her taking a step closer to where she stood. He stretched out his hand to stop hers, but quickly pulled it back when he caught sight of her wrist.<br>With narrowed eyes he tried to take a better look. "Was that bruising?" he wondered to himself.  
>"Can I get you a drink Jimmy?" Lou asked straightening up and walking towards the kitchen.<br>"Ah...yeah a drink would be good." He admitted as he studied her. He was trying to rationalise what he had just seen. Yes people get bruises all the time. But something felt off about that one. From what he saw it wrapped right around her whole wrist. What would cause that?  
>"Are you listening?" Lou giggled as she poured some juice into a glass.<br>"Ha?" Jimmy questioned as he looked up at her.  
>"I asked you how Rachel and Teaspoon were." She smiled, wondering where his head was at.<br>"You haven't seen any of us for weeks and they are the first two that pop into your head to ask about?" Jimmy snapped; a little pissed that she hadn't asked about the other boys.  
>"I was going to ask about everyone Jimmy. What has gotten into you?" Lou snapped back. "Why are you really here Jimmy? I mean I haven't heard from any of you in weeks, I got the feeling you didn't want to know me."<br>"Goes both ways Lou." Jimmy replied coldly. He was not going to stand there and let her place the sole blame on him and the boys.  
>"You're right, it does," Lou agreed after a long silence. Of course she would never tell him that Frank would have her hide if she had contacted them. He had made it perfectly clear that the boys were not welcome here anymore. It wasn't the fact that Frank had threatened to hurt her if she went against his wishes, it was the fact that Frank was changing the way he was hurting her, that kept Lou away.<p>

Lou was no stranger for pain, she sometimes wonder if that is why she decided to hurt herself, because she wasn't being hurt by others, but she was also aware that Frank was slowly crossing the line with her. No longer was his pain always welcomed.  
>At first she embraced Frank's hand, his strength. But over the weeks he had pushed her to levels where she shied away from the pain instead of welcomed it.<br>When Lou first cut herself, she did it to release the built up pain inside of her. She did it as a way of release, and she did it so she knew that she still felt something, rather than feeling dead inside.  
>She would cut when it all became too much. She would cut every now and again, but now she was being cut on what felt like a daily basis.<br>Frank was doing it for his own self pleasure, and the last couple of times he had done it against Lou's wishes, and with brute force.  
>Lou quickly shook her head and focused on Jimmy. He was here making an effort, she needed to do the same.<br>"So what has everyone been up to?" She asked as she sat down in ratty old sofa.  
>As Lou sat down so did Jimmy. She looked up at him expecting his answer, but she noticed that the sun was shining brightly in his eyes.<br>"Here let me close the blind," Lou told him standing to pull the blind.  
>"Thanks,"<br>Lou stretched up to pull on the cord of the blind, she was aware that Jimmy hadn't answered her question. But Jimmy was sitting there amused that Lou had to get to the tips of her toes to pull on the cord. Shaking his head, he went to answer her but he stopped when he noticed that her shirt had risen showing a slither of skin on her hip.  
>It was not the bare skin that had him gripping the arms of the chair. It was the sight of yet another bruise that had him do a double take.<br>His eyes narrowed in on the purple mark. Surely he was mistaken. Surely Lou would have told him that she was being treated poorly by Frank.  
>Surely Lou was stronger than his own Mother. Lou wouldn't stand by and let a man, or anyone for that matter treat her like that.<br>Would she?  
>"Look if you aren't here to talk to me, then what are you here for?" Lou questioned as she finally managed to get the cord for the blinds free.<br>Little did she know that Jimmy was on his feet and standing right behind her. As she turned she screamed in fright not expecting his closeness.  
>"Jimmy what..." she didn't get any further as Jimmy shushed her with his finger up against her lips. She could see in his eyes tears that threatened to spill. He was upset, but by what? Lou did not know.<br>Jimmy swallowed his emotions, as he pulled back the hand that had signalled Lou to keep quiet. He took both of her wrists in his hands and raised them above her head.  
>Jimmy was well aware that Lou was scared about what was happening but he hoped that she knew him well enough to know that he would never cause her harm. He prayed that she knew that he was not cut from the same mould that made his father, and Frank for that matter.<br>Once her hands were above her head, Jimmy stared into her eyes. Their vision blurred by tears, both of them scared and unsure of what was about to happen.  
>Jimmy needing confirmation without hearing lies come from Lou, gathered her wrists in one of his hands. He held a little tighter, sure that she would put up a struggle. In fact he hoped that she would.<br>Jimmy held her wrists up against the wall, while his other hand reached for the hem of her shirt.  
>Lou could not contain the small whimper that fell from her mouth.<p>

No, Jimmy wasn't being rough but he was sure dragging up some unwanted memories. She was scared because she didn't know what he was whimper came spilling out of her the higher Jimmy got with her shirt. "Jimmy...please stop. You're scaring me." Lou finally allowed herself to cry. Jimmy stared at her, his own tears now falling as her words finally cracked his barrier. He knew she was scared, he could feel her body shaking. But hell he was scared too.  
>He was scared that he had allowed another woman in his life to live a life of torment. He felt responsible for this, just as he did with his Mother.<br>But he had to do this if he was to help her. He had to know what he was dealing with.  
>Jimmy continued to pull Lou's shirt up and over her head, dropping the clothing at their feet. He waited and watched Lou's face, trying to see if there was any recognition to what it was he was looking for. Surely she had to know.<br>Closing his eyes for all but a second, pictures of his Mother's bruised face and arms flashed behind his eyelids.  
>His eyes flew open and he took a step back from Lou, ready himself for what he was about to see.<br>Lou's face was red with embarrassment and anger.  
>"Lou..." Jimmy said sadly as his eyes travelled up her arms and down her torso. There were dark angry bruises around her wrists, finger shaped bruises around the tops of her arms, scratches at the swell of her breasts and bruises on her hips.<br>Jimmy swallowed the bile as his mind went took in every mark and how they got there. Of course he knew that Frank put them there, and although he had never been with anyone before, he knew that the marks on Lou's body were not made by Frank standing in front of her abusing her. They were made by Frank while he was on top of her.  
>"Lou..." He said again.<br>"I hate you." Lou spat. "I hate you."  
>Jimmy tried to ignore the venom in her voice. He needed to see this for himself. He was doing this so he could help her.<br>Lou started to thrash about so Jimmy held her wrists a little tighter as his other hand went to the button on her jeans.  
>He could feel his tears cascading down his cheeks as his chest ached with pain.<br>He unzipped the rest of her pants and pushed them down Lou's body the best he could with his spare hand.  
>Lou started becoming hysterical. She was scared of him right now. All she had in her mind was that he was just another male in her life that wanted more from her.<br>Jimmy had not once indicated that he was looking for bruises, or signs that Lou was being abused. So Lou had no idea that was all he wanted. In her eyes he was trying to take from her what wasn't his to take.  
>She wasn't going to allow it. She was not going to let him have her that way. She started thrashing harder, but there was suddenly no point.<br>Her arms were free.  
>Jimmy's eyes saw bruises around the tops and on the insides of Lou's legs. But it was not those that had him lose his grip on Lou's wrists.<br>He completely let her go and took a few steps back from her. He didn't know what to say. He didn't know what to ask, because he was not really sure at what he was looking at.  
>"Are those...I mean...are they..." Jimmy didn't want to say it. He didn't know if he could say it. His eyes narrowed in on the several raw, angry looking marks on one of Lou's upper thigh. "Are they cut marks?" He just came out and asked.<br>Lou's knees buckled sending her falling to the ground in a heap. Her small body shaking with sobs as her hands covered her face so Jimmy could not see her.  
>"Does he cut you?"<br>Lou shook her head no, but Jimmy just knew that Frank was involved somehow. And in this moment Jimmy could not believe a word Lou said.  
>"THEN WHO LOU?" Jimmy roared, "WHO THE FUCK DID THIS TO YOU? WHO IN THE HELL PUT THOSE ON YOUR SKIN" Jimmy was yelling, and the fact that the man in the apartment next door was banging on the wall, let Jimmy know he was doing it loudly.<br>"I did." Lou cried.  
>"What? I can't fucking hear you."<br>"I did" Lou said louder.  
>"Why Lou, why would you do that to yourself?"Jimmy asked, not believing her for one second. There was no way someone would do that to themselves.<br>Lou shook her head. She could not begin to explain how she felt or what it does to her when she cuts. She couldn't explain it, and even if she could, it wouldn't matter because Jimmy would never understand it.  
>Jimmy saw that he wasn't going to get an answer from her so he asked her something else. "Does Frank beat you?"<br>"No." Lou snapped. "He's just rough when we..." Lou moved her head from side to side hoping that Jimmy would catch on that she was talking about sex, without having to say the words. When Jimmy's eyes widened she knew he got what she meant. "I like it."  
>"No you don't." Jimmy argued.<br>"Yes I do Jimmy."  
>"No if you liked it then you wouldn't look as ashamed as you do right now. If you liked it then you wouldn't hide the marks that he leaves behind." Jimmy told her. "I think that you don't know what the hell you like. I think that you have been treated like shit for most of your life that you just expect that is how life should be. I think that you are hiding in this bullshit existence because it's safe for you. You would rather live like this then face your problems."<br>"Fuck you Jimmy, you don't know shit." Lou told him. She pulled herself up off of the floor and pulled her pants up doing them up and grabbing her shirt to cover herself. She had been humiliated enough for today.  
>"Then tell me. I'm here, and I want to know." Lou smoothed her clothes down as she kept her eyes on Jimmy.<br>"I want you to go."  
>"I'm not going anywhere." he told her as he sat stubbornly back down in his chair. There was no way he was leaving her a second time. Clearly they had fucked up leaving her with Frank last time. There was no way he was making the same mistake.<br>"Go Jimmy," Lou cried as her head swung towards the door, as if expecting someone. "If Frank finds you here..."  
>"If you think for one minute that I would leave you here, alone, with him, knowing what I know." Jimmy shook his head and looked towards the door as well. "You are sorely mistaken."<br>Lou started panicking. She knew that if Frank arrived home he was going to be pissed. She also knew that Frank would tell Jimmy just how much of a freak she truly was.  
>Jimmy would know that she was not lying when she said she liked it. No she did not like they way Frank took advantage of her and her body when she was in her dazed state. She didn't understand why he was so rough with her when she freely let him hurt her with every cut he made.<br>"I want you to go Jimmy." Lou said more sternly.  
>"I'm not going Lou."<br>"Then I'll go." Lou started for the door, determined that she was not going to spend another second with Jimmy.  
>"Please Lou just help me understand all of this." Jimmy tried. He just couldn't walk away from her. "You have to tell me something. I mean the thoughts that are running through my head...they're not good ones." Jimmy tried again. This time getting a reaction.<br>"Imagine what's running through mine." For the first time since she made the first cut, Lou felt ashamed and she realised that what she had been doing to herself was wrong. She realised that she was no better off than she was before she started cutting.  
>In fact she was worse off.<p>

She thought that she was lessening the pain, releasing it when she cut, but she was adding to it.  
>Lou was suddenly aware that she was wrong about everything.<br>Pulling her sleeves up and over her hands Lou walked backwards until her back was against the wall. Her body slid down to the floor, where she pulled her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms around her legs and resting her head on her knees.  
>"When I cut it takes the pain away from here." Lou sat up a bit and held her covered hand over her heart. "For just a second that pain disappears and I feel relief as I welcome a different pain." Lou resumed her first position with her head resting on her knees. "I ah...after I cut, I feel lighter even if it is only for a second. But after that second, slowly but surely I can feel the ache starting to build up inside of me again. Days or sometimes a week later I feel so heavy. I can't sleep, I can't eat and I can't even think straight. The pain in my chest nearly cripples me. My fingers become restless, my thighs begin to itch and the next thing I know I am scratching at old wounds trying to open them up, but it's not the same. I need a different pain." Lou sobbed as did Jimmy as he continued to listen.<br>"I use to go and get my blade, sit in the shower and watch the blood stream down the drain. I use to have my own routine. I use to be in control of it all." Lou looked up at Jimmy, her eyes dark and empty.  
>Jimmy wiped his eyes with his hand. A part of him wishes he had never asked, and the other part of him was angry that he hadn't asked earlier.<br>_"Frank has his own routine,"_ Lou whispered, but Jimmy heard her.  
>"What do you mean, Frank has his own routine?"<br>"That night after you all left I couldn't take it. I needed to feel..." Lou's eyebrows furrowed as she said that. "Or maybe I wanted to un-feel." She shook her head feeling like she didn't really know anything anymore. "He came home and saw me," Lou wailed as her mind went back to that night. She let him cut her, and then the things he did after...She didn't stop him. "That was the night he took over cutting me."  
>Jimmy felt like he was going to be sick as he digested her words. He could feel his own panic building up inside of him as he had no idea how to deal with this. And he could see that Lou needed help.<br>Serious help.

* * *

><p><strong>A big thank you to Jenna who went over this for me, xxxx<strong>


	10. Chapter 10

**I do not own the Young Riders**

* * *

><p>Jimmy slammed his hand on the steering wheel as he neared the ranch. "Stupid, stupid, stupid," he berated himself. He should not have left her there. Not after everything she had told him.<p>

Not after everything he had seen.

Jimmy didn't know what to say to her. He couldn't even look at her after everything he had learnt.

All he could think was this is bigger than me. He knew that he needed help, for Lou to get help. So he did the first thing that came to mind and headed for home.

Jimmy pulled up to the house, dread twisting his stomach, knowing that this was not going to end well. His dread was fuelled when his eyes he saw Cody sitting on the porch steps, covered from the rain and looking towards the truck as Jimmy drove down the driveway. Jimmy just knew that Cody was waiting for him.

Sighing out loud he killed the ignition and got out of the truck.

At the sound of the truck door slamming shut, the other boys filed out of the bunkhouse awaiting the confrontation they knew was about to happen.

Ike hoped that Cody got it out of his system quickly, cos if Teaspoon was right and Jimmy had visited with Lou, he wanted to know how she was doing. It had slowly been killing him not being able to go and see her.

As everyday passed the angrier he got with everyone.

"Jimmy I told you," Cody sneered as he stood from the porch step.

"You told me what?" Jimmy snapped back wondering what nerve Cody had to be telling him anything.

"I told you to stay away from her. She made her choice. If she wants us back in her lives she has some apologising to do and a dickhead to discard of."

The hate that was in Cody's voice was felt all as he talked about Frank. Jimmy breathed in deeply as he knew it was about to get a whole lot worse.

Teaspoon had heard the raised voices but stayed back and listened. These boys were men now and they had to sort some things out by themselves.

"Jimmy I told you to leave her alone. She should come to us. It was her…" Cody went to go make his point once again by walking up and standing face to face with Jimmy.

Jimmy could see the fire in Cody's eyes, he knew he was pissed, but Jimmy had to tell him, had to make him see that leaving Lou alone was not an option, not now not ever.

"She's in trouble Cody." Jimmy told him pushing him back and out of his face.

Cody stumbled slightly as he looked to Jimmy sceptically, "What kind of trouble?" Cody questioned, wiping wetness of the rain from his face.

"She's got problems Cody," Jimmy stressed, "Up here," pointing to his head.

Cody took a step back looking at Jimmy not knowing what he was on about. What in the hell did he mean not right in the head?

Jimmy seeing Cody was about to lose what cool he was only just clinging to, quickly blurted out for all to hear, "Cody her body is a mess, she's got bruises and cut marks all over her body."

Buck dropped his head into his hands cursing himself for not letting Ike ring Lou days ago.

"What?" Cody asked no louder than a whisper as his throat was blocked by panic, worry and fear. His feet started to shift slightly to the truck readying himself to fly down the road and race to Lou's side.

"Cut marks, what sort of cut marks?" Buck asked from his spot on the chair.

"She ah…." Jimmy looked to Kid for some help as he knew that once Jimmy laid it all out there was no way that any of them were keeping Cody back.

"She cuts herself. She lets him cut her."

"He cuts her?" Cody roared. Jimmy nodded in his head at Cody's question.

Ike raced towards Buck almost tripping on his own two feet. He shoved his friend in the chest with tears of rage in his eyes.

"I TOLD YOU!" he stressed frantically with his hands. "I TOLD YOU. YOU SHOULD HAVE RUNG!" Ike signed angrily.

Buck was shocked by Ike's outburst but could not deny that he should have listened. They were all at fault in some way. They all felt Frank was bad news and they all knew Lou was vulnerable, but they let their stupid pride get in the way.

All they saw was that she had chosen him over them. They were hurt so pretended as if they didn't care.

Cody leant over resting his hands on his knees while he willed the bile in his throat to stay there.

"He cut's her?" Kid's voice asked not believing anything he was hearing. He didn't understand what that meant. "I don't understand. I mean how does he cut her? And what do you mean she is sick?"

"He cuts her with a blade Kid, anything sharp that causes her to bleed. She's sick because if he doesn't do it she does it to herself she has it in her head that she likes it." Jimmy rattled off but never took his eyes from Cody's hunched over form.

"I believe that she believes that it helps her. She's hurting and she doesn't know how to release that pain. This is her relief." Jimmy explained in his own words what Lou had told him.

"He hits her though?" Cody suddenly said, as he was trying to work things out in his own head. "You said she has bruises and cut marks, so are you telling me that she hits herself too or does he just do that to finish her off?" Cody snapped as he rose to his fall height ready for Jimmy's answer.

"Jimmy looked at him seeing that Cody was on the edge he knew that, hell they all were but Cody and Lou had a bond that the others didn't. "She says no. She says its….she said he is just rough when they're….well you know." Jimmy said awkward.

Cody though, he had heard enough.

He pushed past Jimmy and the others and raced to the truck, pulling the door open before turning the ignition and tearing down the drive way in a cloud of dust and stones.

"Ah hell," Teaspoon said grabbing his own keys and heading toward the boys yelling to Rachel that something had happened.

Rachel came running from the house just in time to see Cody tearing down the drive way. She saw that Teaspoon was heading towards his truck with the boys running after him.

"When are those kids going to get a break?" She wondered out loud just knowing that this was about Lou.

.

.

.

Cody had his foot heavy on the accelerator as he speed towards town. All he kept thinking was he wished he and Lou had stayed with Will. He wished he had stayed put like his heart was telling him too.

At least if he and Lou were in the city he would know what to do, how to protect her there. He feels like he can't protect her here. He doesn't know how too.

And that scares him.

He gripped the steering wheel tight praying that Frank was going to be there. He wanted nothing more than to smack the shit out of him.

"Hang on Lou, I'm coming,"

.

.

.

.

"What do you mean you think it would be best if I left?"

"Frank calm down, please…" Lou cried backing away from him. She could see he was becoming irate and once he was in that state it took a lot to calm him down.

"I won't calm the fuck down Lou. I come home to find you a crying mess on the floor and you tell me I have to leave, now what the hell has happened."

"Jimmy came here. He saw my marks." As soon as Lou said the words she knew she had made a mistake. Frank's eyes got huge and he stormed over to her grabbing Lou by the tops of her arms.

"And how the fuck did he see them unless you were naked in front of him?" He roared. "Is that how it is Lou, I'm off working while you've been whoring yourself to your little boyfriends?"

"No, that's not how it is. Don't be stupid."

"Oh so I'm the stupid one. My god girl, take a look in the fucking mirror." Frank smiled. "You're scared, your fat, you look like you have been searching the bottom of the fucking clothing bins for clothes." He sneered, "You wonder why I never take you with me when I visit my friends, why you have never met my mother…It's because you're embarrassing. I don't want to be seen with you outside this fucking shithole."

Frank continued to smile especially when he saw Lou starting to itch at her palms with her finger nails. He was working her up to where he wanted her.

"Then why do you stay?" Lou asked in a soft whisper.

"Because you let me fuck you the way I like to fuck." He laughed as he looked over her body.

Lou flinched, when he said things like that she actually felt like a whore. Her fingers continued to scrape at her palms.

"What? It's true. You are some kind of freak Lou, and it is only because of that I stay." To make his point he let go of Lou's arms and held her wrists pulling her fingers away from her palms. "See this is what I'm talking about." He tsked as he looked down and the raw looking marks on the palms of Lou's pale skin.

Lou whimpered as her body shook. She didn't get the release that she craved. She could feel her toes curl as her need to release was out of her reach.

Frank smirked at the withering mess in front of him. He owned her. He gave her what she wanted. No one is fucking taking that from him. "Tell me Lou has anyone ever been gentle with you? Has anyone made love to you?" He smiled knowing that it wasn't the case. "By the looks of you I'm thinking no. You are not the kind of girl men fall in love with Lou. You are not the kind of girl men actually want to keep around.

"You are the dirty little secret we keep at home. Did any of your Daddies show you love Lou? Did they read you stories, kiss you lovingly on the head at night, or shower you with gifts?" Franks asked seeing that Lou was close to losing it. The feeling it gave him to see her in such a state was accelerating, "Or did they sneak into your room so no one would see them with you…."

Lou cried out as her knees buckled, Frank gleamed in victory. "See, not worthy of love," he started to pull her towards their bedroom. His hands tightly wrapped around her wrists as he pulled her to where he wanted her.

Once in the room he pushed her onto the bed and reached his bedside drawer. Never taking his eyes off of her he reached in and grabbed his little tin case and dropped it down beside her.

His hands then reached for her jeans and he started to undo them. As he looked into her eyes he couldn't deny that she was beautiful.

Freeing her of jeans he kissed his previous marks on her thighs. His hand reached for his tin pulling out the blade that rested in there.

"Please don't…" Lou suddenly cried shocking both herself and Frank.

He thought he had her in that mood, in that desperate state. Never had she told him to stop.

Lou on the other hand was fighting with all her might to go against the thing she wanted most in the world. But her mind kept going to Jimmy's face when he saw her this afternoon. He was hurt and sad when he had seen her and she didn't want to see him that way. She didn't want to see any of her boys in that way. She needed to put a stop to this. She needed help.

"Hush," Frank snapped as he raised the blade to her skin,

"Frank please I said no. I don't want this…"

Lou started struggling and Frank was losing his grip on her. Placing the blade down he used both of his hands to still her. "You are mine Lou," he yelled as he moved himself to sit on her upper body, trapping Lou's arms under his legs.

Lou's screams were loud as she felt herself trapped. She cried and she screamed her legs the only thing able to move. But Frank's hands put a stop to that.

"You fucken bitch," he spat as he punched her in the thigh, giving Lou a dead leg instantly. Frank reached for the blade so fucking angry with the little slut.

Her cries fell on deaths ears as Frank sliced through her skin, deeper than he had gone before. Lou screamed in agony as Frank removed the blade to press it against her skin in a different place on her leg cutting deeply again.

Lou screamed out wildly again, and again as Frank kept cutting her skin.

"YOU MOTHER FUCKER…." Cody's voice roared as he came charging through the bedroom tackling Frank off of Lou's small body.

The boys hit the ground hard, both firing punches whenever they could. Lou rolled over onto her side facing away from the boys. She was crying out in pain as her hands reached down to clasp her thigh.

Without looking she could feel the blood, she knew he had gone deep and was a little scared to look. She reached out and grabbed a pillow pulling the pillow case off of it and wrapping it around her thigh.

"Lou…get…to…the…truck…" Cody stressed between punches. He needed her out of this house and away from Frank. He knew she was hurt, but he also knew that the boys were not far behind him.

.

.

.

Lou ran out of the house the best she could, not being able to put to much weight on her left leg and nearly slipping on the wet grass, was making it all that much harder.

She didn't think to grab a damn thing all she knew is that she needed to do as Cody had asked of her. Jumping in the car the best she could she chanced a look at her leg, seeing the pillow slip was now soaking with blood.

'Is that amount blood a bad sign?' she wondered to herself, not really getting a chance to dwell on it as Cody's body slammed into the side of the truck as his hands fumbled to find the handle.

Lou's heart raced as she saw Frank come stumbling out of the house chasing after Cody.

"CODY, QUICK," she screamed as she locked her door, thinking maybe Frank would try and grab her from the truck.

Cody slipped in the truck and locked his door just like Lou had done. Frank started booting the side of the truck while Cody's rushed fingers struggled with the keys.

"CODY," Lou cried, as she shook in fear.

"I know Lou, but you're alright," he soothed as the truck roared to life.

Lou looked out the window towards Frank. She could see he was rushing to his Truck also. "Oh god," she whimpered, "He's coming Cody." She cried.

Cody looked up in the rear view mirror seeing Frank speeding up behind them. "Lou put your seat belt on." He told her calmly as he too fastened his belt. The rain was coming down fast and he knew that the roads were not going to be safe.

He chanced a quick look in her direction, seeing the blood that soaked the cloth around her thigh. It was then that he also noticed she wasn't wearing any pants, just her blouse and her panties.

"Are you in pain Lou?" He asked worried that, that amount of blood couldn't be right.

"Don't worry about me Cody, just watch where you're driving" she stressed as she kept looking behind them. She did not know if the goose bumps that covered her body were through fear or from the cold.

Cody didn't know where to head. He could see Lou needed a Doctor, but he felt safer taking her back to the farm, especially with Frank close behind them.

Thinking he will just head for home, hoping the boys will cross their path he sped in that direction.

"CODY!" Lou screamed as she saw Frank coming up fast behind them.

Cody didn't get a chance to look, cos Frank's car slammed into the back of their truck, shunting their body's forward with a heap of force.

The truck swerved as Cody lost his grip for just a second, as the car struggled to grip the wet road. Quickly he regained control of the truck, pressing the accelerator flat to the floor of the truck.

He knew that it was risky with the amount of water on the road, but his main concern was getting away from Frank.

Lou shook in fear thinking Frank was going to kill them. She had a sick feeling in the pit of her gut. She just knew that this was the end.

Cody's driving become erratic as he was busy keeping an eye on Frank behind him, watching the road in front of him and glancing looks at Lou beside him. He knew that he should only be watching the road ahead of them, but he was panicking and he couldn't really think or act straight.

Frank came screaming up behind them once again striking the back of the truck, but this time he hit them a little more from the side.

Lou screamed as her hands gripped the dash as their truck spun in the middle of the road.

Cody was yelling at her to cover her head, he was failing at keeping a hold of the wheel, as Frank's truck slammed into them again sending them to the road side.

"CODY!"


End file.
